Fearless
by alwaysandforever.x
Summary: A short, romantic love story revolved around a broken Bella, and a blind Edward. Can they heal eachother or will their problems be too much to overcome? All-Human, based off the Taylor Swift song.
1. Imagine

_Summary: Afraid of everything, hated by most, life's not easy for everyone- especially not Bella Swan. Little does she know Edward Cullen is set to turn her life around. But what if he's just as damaged as she is? Can they help eachother, or are they past saving? A short, romantic, angsty story. Based off the Taylor Swift song, also called Fearless._

_This is a new one from me! And one I'm hopeful for... if people like it I'll continue. It's going to be short-ish story, with about 10 chapters at most. I hope you all like it! Prepare for it to be a little bit depressing at first... it'll soon get a LOT happier though. And prepare for one of the fluffiest HEA's ever too. _

_If you like it, let me know!_

* * *

"_And I don't know how it gets better then this,  
__You take my hand and drag me headfirst, fearless.  
__And I don't know why but with you I'd dance,  
__In a storm in my best dress, fearless."_

**_Fearless_**

**_Chapter One._**

**Preface**

In this moment, as I stood here in the pouring rain in the darkness of midnight I knew one thing for certain.

I knew that now my life was no longer the miserable and lonely one I knew before… the one that was all I had known for seventeen years.

… And I also knew that it didn't matter that the girls at school were out to get me, it didn't matter that my mom still blamed me for my best friends death all those months ago. And it didn't matter that no one really likes me, or ever has.

… _It didn't matter because I know that he does. _

In these weeks he has taught me so much - he has helped me become myself, away from the lifeless shadow that I used to be.

I looked over at him, to see his green eyes gleaming with some unknown emotion. "Do you want to dance?" he asked me softly, brushing my wet cheek with his fingertips.

And even though it was crazy… being out in this rain, soaked to the skin, with only the darkness of the sky above us. It seemed that somehow these things only made the moment even more perfect.

We laughed as we danced and we swayed together, and then he began spinning us around together, so fast I was sure we were going to fall.

_But I'm not afraid. _

Because of what he kept whispering in my ear- _"You are my life now… I love you, Isabella Swan."_

"_Imagine no possessions,  
__I wonder if you can?  
__No need for greed or hunger,_  
_A brotherhood of man,  
__Imagine all the people,  
__Sharing all the world._

_You may say I'm a dreamer,  
__But I'm not the only one.  
__I hope some day you'll join us,  
__And the world will live as one…"_

_**Two Months Ago...**_

**_Chapter one._**

A night full of vivid dreams quickly faded away and before I knew it the darkness had passed and soon it was my least favourite time of day again. The morning… the start of a new day… oh, how I hated it.

I slowly, reluctantly opened my eyes, and looked out of the window, only to see the sight of grey again. The way that my bed was positioned meant that I always awoke to the sight of the window every morning, which meant that dismal skies that covered Forks for the majority of the year were always the first thing that I saw.

The skies that covered this dull town were just like my life… they always looking the same - bleak and unappealing.

As I yawned and stretched I noticed that it seemed like it was earlier then my normal time to get up, it looked even darker then usual.

_So, why was I even awake at this time again...?_

The nightmares rarely woke me, so it couldn't have been that.

I groaned loudly as I pulled the covers back over me, trying to salvage another hour of sleep. I knew if I managed it, that by the time I got up that it would only be me in the house… something that I always wished for.

As I began to drift again, wishing for the silence to still me, I became aware of an annoying buzzing - no ringing - sound coming from beside me. I prayed it would go away or just stop after a moment or two.

… _No such luck._

I realised after a short amount of time that it was alarm clock making this noise, the time on it read 6am.

Meaning only one thing…

I glanced over to the calendar on my wall in panic, and sure enough it was the first day of September, and the start of senior year - the first day back at school after the summer.

_Oh how I hate these days with a deep passion. _

I hate how the time passed so quickly- the time spanning from June to September being nothing but a blur.

Admittedly the summer hadn't been enjoyable for me in the slightest. All I had done was spend the days working and secluding myself in this room, not having anyone to spend my time with.

However, I would choose staying home alone any day as compared to having to face them crowded halls of Forks high again.

Because all that did was remind me even more of how people felt about me- at least if I was at home I could pretend that the situation was different, and that I did have people out there who cared.

I slowly crawled out of the comfort and security of my bed, getting myself ready for the day, all the while mentally preparing myself for the day ahead.

I pulled on my comfy pair of baggy jeans and dark green sweater and chose to tie my hair up.

_Funny how as I dressed simply and dreaded what was ahead of me, that I didn't realise how today's events would change everything. _

I walked cautiously down the stairs, hoping that my dad Charlie had gone to work already, unfortunately when I walked into the kitchen my hope was erased as he sat reading the newspaper and drinking coffee just like every morning.

If people actually cared then they may ask me - _why do I dread seeing Charlie?_

To which, I would always answer with a surprising response- it wasn't because Charlie was mean to me, or beat me or anything remotely like that… actually, I would rather have them things then his actual way of acting around me.

No… the problem is that he _ignores_ me.

Which basically means that most of the time he doesn't talk to me, or acknowledge me - apart from the times when I talk to him, which in that case he'll only reply with one worded answers if I'm lucky.

_If I'm lucky… yeah right, I'm far from it. _

I rushed past him noting that he didn't look up as I passed, and then I grabbed a couple of things from the cupboards trying to find something worth eating for breakfast, but as I turned back to face the table he was gone.

I sighed, trying not to let it affect me- I should be used to it by now after all.

I leaned against the cupboard, looking out of the window again, regretting it instantly - the weather looked impossible worse then usual today. I cringed at the sight of the heavy rain pouring down, making the green and grey colours of the street seem even more monotone.

I packed my bag quickly deciding on taking my rain coat as some sort of shelter, and then quickly walked out of the front door as I pulled the hood over my head and began the walk to school.

The wind was painfully cold, making me literally cringe, and cars splashed me as they passed along the road. For a moment I considered how convenient it would be to actually have a car of my own… maybe I can try saving some money from my job so I could get one? … I knew that I wouldn't need anything too extravagant, just simple and able to get me to places instead of having to walk and take the risk of getting sick everyday.

… Actually, that seemed unlikely. Who am I kidding? I got my job at the Café so that I can save for college - I can live without a car, but Dartmouth's my future… well, if I was to go ahead with college that is.

When I finally made it to school, everyone was already there, the car lot was full of cars, and groups of people all standing around talking and laughing… probably talking about their summer vacations and the start of the new year.

I passed them all, finding that it didn't really bother me when no one looked my way… it was something that I had grown used to. However, as I passed one last group of people, I heard them talking about some new students joining the school.

_Figures._

Only in a town as small as this would it be such huge gossip… back in Phoenix, the schools were so large that no one noticed when a new person came, they just seemed to blend in… unlike here.

It wasn't that long ago that I was the new girl here, and everyone felt that it was their duty to gossip about me, and then try to befriend me, simply because I was someone new… something different. In other words, some sort of meager excitement in this dull, bleak town. Only, that attention soon faded away quickly when they discovered what I was like.

Bitter. Cynical. Sad. _Afraid._

I had my reasons though… and still do. I like things the way they are… I don't like to let people get close to me, and prefer to just stay in the shadows. I know that by doing that I can just be myself… I don't have to pretend to be happy, or to be something for anyone.

I'm fine with being alone…

_Or so I keep telling myself._

I passed the group quickly, noticing that it consisted of Jessica Stanley, Mike Newton, Lauren Mallory and some others. They were the people who originally tried to befriend me, but who also gave up quickly. I tried not to listen to what they were saying but managed to pick up on a few words, which consisted of things like-

'_A whole new family- three of them,'_

'_They moved here from Chicago, but no one knows why.'_

'_One is really handsome, but is apparently disabled,'_

I blocked them out after that, unable to listen to what they were saying… do they honestly have no shame?!

I eventually made my way to my first class without any problem, and sighed resignedly when I found my seat. Once again, no one sat beside me and I was glad about that. At least now I could just lose myself in my thoughts, and not have to force casual conversation at all.

The teacher began talking, welcoming us all back for our final year, telling us how important it would be, but instead all I thought about was what happened… less then a year ago.

I pulled at the chain around my neck, lifting the locket out from under my top, and grasped it hard in my hand as I closed my eyes tightly, willing myself not to cry.

Even though the morning hours dragged by, it still didn't seem like long before it was lunch, and I found myself sitting in my normal seat in the far corner of the cafeteria. I only picked at my sandwich and apple I had bought from home, not feeling over hungry.

Sometimes a couple of people would sit at the end of my table, namely Angela Webber and Ben Cheney – we wouldn't talk, but it did help on the whole embarrassment thing. Because even though I did want to be left alone, I couldn't help but feel shame whenever I sat by myself, due to the looks I would get from other people.

Yeah… today was one of those days.

I ignored peoples stares as best as I could and quickly took a quick look around the room, glancing at the regular tables, at the cliques that never seemed to change.

I looked at them all, until I saw people I didn't know… who I had never seen before.

There were three of them, so I instantly knew that these were the new people that were being gossiped about earlier. They sat at a table in the opposite corner to me, and seemed oblivious to everything around them. The Hale Twins, Rosalie and Jasper were sitting with them, which surprised me – as they were famous for not talking to anyone but eachother – but now they seemed the complete opposite as they laughed and joked with the new kids.

Firstly, there was one girl who looked very petite and had black spiky hair, next to her there was a boy who had dark curly hair, and who was pretty much the opposite to the girl – mainly because he was very large and muscular.

And then… there was _him_.

He sat on the seat, which was the closest to the wall and seemed, like he was quieter then the rest of them – he still laughed, but not so much, and I never saw him say anything. They were all beautiful, but he was by far the most, with messy reddish brown hair, which could almost be called bronze, and with soft looking pale skin. The only thing that seemed weird about him was the fact that he was wearing black sunglasses – why would he need them in Forks and more importantly, indoors? It seemed bizarre, but perhaps he had a good reason, so I decided to ignore it.

And instead I just watched them all… I lowered my head so that my hair framed my face hiding it from anyone's view, and looked at them out of the corner of my eye. I watched as they all ate the food served here, grimacing at the meatloaf or whatever it was supposed to be. I smiled as I saw them joking, playing jokes on eachother, and found myself curious whenever they ended up in deep conversation.

It was then that something hit me… it was _want_. For a year I hadn't wanted to talk to anyone and hadn't wanted anyone to notice me, but in this moment… I couldn't help but wonder what it would be like to be friends with them.

How crazy the thought was soon settled in, and I found myself embarrassed at my thoughts… I didn't even know them. I hadn't spoken to anyone of them… so why was I wishing to be their friends? I don't have friends… I don't have anyone. It's as simple as that.

I quickly picked up my bag and pulled it over my shoulder, feeling far too ashamed to be sitting in here anymore. I quickly ran out, not caring that people were looking or whispering about me, and made my way towards my next class just as the bell rang.

I put all my thoughts to the back of my mind and vowed to forget about last lunch and about _them_. It was in the past, and now I had to focus on the now… which was my English class.

I almost felt like smiling as I made my way to my seat - I loved English, it had always been my favourite class. It was something that I hadn't lost a year ago, as books… literature… writing… would always be a big part of me. Not to mention it was the only subject I considered myself to be good at.

The class was pretty much full now, save for one seat next to me, and I smiled at that. I was in the one subject I liked at school, and I felt okay. Nothing was going to mess this up for me, not anything or anyone…

"Okay, Edward, you can have the seat next to Isabella, I'll just show you…"

… _Apart from him._

I looked up from my desk to see the teacher Mr. Greene, talking to him… the bronze haired boy I admired at lunch, the boy who was clearly called Edward. I summised that I liked that name… sure, it wasn't exactly popular nowadays at all, but it seemed to suit him.

"Isabella, can help you with your work…" Mr. Greene was explaining to him, his voice and actions sounding almost nervous or uncomfortable even.

Edward sighed, pushing his sunglasses, which he was still wearing, back into place. "I don't need any help," he muttered quietly.

His comment stung… he clearly must have taken one look at me and decided that he didn't want to talk to me at all.

Figures.

Only, as Mr. Greene lead him to the desk, I suddenly realised the truth… just as everyone else in the room seemed to as well as they turned to look at him. I wondered how I hadn't noticed before… because Edward's actions, although smooth, were not confident. They were afraid and tentative, as if he didn't know where he was going.

And his sunglasses… they weren't just there was a fashion accessory… they were cover for his eyes.

… Because he was blind.

… And his comment about not needing help was not in offence to me… he didn't even know who I was or anything about me at all. But, instead his comment was about pride… he didn't want to feel like he was unable to do things just because of it, and he certainly didn't want other people thinking that.

He slowly sat in the seat beside me – the one that was against the wall – and leant his cane, which I somehow hadn't noticed until now against it. I was aware that I was staring, but couldn't find it in me to stop. It wasn't that I thought he was a freak or different… but that I was amazed by him.

Mr. Greene asked Edward if he was okay one more time, only receiving a nod in response, before he had to resign to the fact that he wasn't going to get much more then that. He made his way to the front of the class and told us to get our books out. I already had mine piled in front of me, so instead I watched out of the corner of my eye as Edward reached to pull his own books out of his bag, running his fingers along the front of them, before placing them on the desk too.

I only felt in even more awe of them when I noticed that they were in Braille… that was how he could figure out which ones he needed to use. Although along with the awe, I also felt sadness for him – not pity exactly – just sadness… because of his own heartbroken expression.

Mr. Greene told us all to skip to page 50, and gave me a pointed look. I swallowed hard, and turned towards Edward, knowing it would be more difficult for him.

"Erm, d-do you want help with that?" I asked him nervously - mostly nerves out of talking to such as beautiful stranger, and worrying what his response.

Somewhere in the back of my mind I also noted that this was the first time I had spoken out loud today… I tried not to think of it as a coincidence.

Edward let out a breath beside me, "No, I'm fine," he replied shortly, as he flicked through the pages himself.

I nodded, but then realised that he couldn't see that, so I muttered- "Okay then." As I felt foolish for even asking… it was clear already that he liked to do things for himself.

I heard him let out another soft breath and his expression change into a slight frown, as he listened to Mr. Greene talk. I decided to turn my attention to the class now… Edward didn't need my help, so I would focus on the subject that I loved as best I could.

The class passed quickly, and soon it was 10 minutes before the end. Mr. Greene told us we could spend the last ten minutes just talking amongst ourselves, or reading if we preferred- seeing as it was the first day back after all.

I pulled out my book Wuthering Heights and opened it up to the page I was last on, and prepared myself for a good ten minutes of reading, when a soft voice filled the space beside me-

"I'm sorry if I seemed rude earlier," Edward apologised, his head turned towards me.

I blinked a couple of times, surprised that he was talking to me and that he was actually apologising. After several seconds of surprise, I finally found my voice -"It's okay… I understand," I told him sincerely.

His eyebrows creased slightly, "You do?" he asked warily.

I nodded, and began talking without really thinking it through. "Sure… you're clearly able to do things for yourself, but you're tired of people thinking that you can't… you don't want to rely on people and want to be independent." I explained softly, watching a range of emotions flicker across his face, before apologising myself- "I'm sorry too."

He frowned, "there's no need to apologise," he whispered, lowering his head slightly.

I let out a breath, but couldn't think of anything to say… I didn't know what to say that wouldn't seem weird in this situation.

It was his voice however that broke the short silence, "so… please tell me that the weather isn't always this bad in this town," he murmured.

I laughed slightly, "I hate to tell you, but this…" – I glanced out of the window at the pouring rain – "is what we call _good_ weather here."

He laughed quietly, "Great," he muttered to himself. "I think I'm actually going to miss the windy city, as crazy as that sounds."

I remembered people saying that they were from Chicago… I guess that was clearly true based on what he just said.

"That doesn't sound crazy," I whispered, thinking things through as I spoke - "I used to live in Phoenix… one of the most humid places in the US… I always complained about how hot it was. Yet I would give _anything_ to go back there now," I explained, my voice growing sadder as I spoke. Needing the comfort, I pulled my locket back out from under my shirt so I could hold it again, relaxing as I held it tight in my palm.

Edward clearly heard the sadness in my voice - I saw him frown slightly, even despite the sunglasses covering a large amount of his face, "Are you okay?" he asked me quietly.

I looked up at him in surprise, "Erm, yeah, I'm fine," I managed to stutter out unconvincingly, before attempting to change the subject- "So, why did you decide to come to such an _ordinary_ school like this?" I asked him casually; knowing that Fork's high must seem very boring compared to the schools in Chicago.

Only, it seemed that Edward misinterpreted my question – his expression instantly changed from being warm and friendly, to cold, hard… and almost angry. "You mean a _'normal'_ school?" he asked quietly, hurt clear in his voice.

"No, that's not what I meant…" I instantly jumped to defend myself, surprised that he honestly thought that I was saying something against his disability, considering the start of our conversation. I cleared my throat, "What I meant was-"

But he cut me off mid-sentence, "I don't want to know," he told me lowly.

I tried to defend myself again, hating that he had got this impression of me. "But, Edward, I-"

But he cut me off again, "Just leave me alone, please?" he asked me quietly, in a voice so broken that I finally realised… he wasn't angry, he was just upset and hurt.

I opened my mouth, intending to tell him that I didn't mean anything against his disability – and that I was only trying to make another lame joke about this boring town. But it seemed that he didn't want to listen… so what was the point of trying? For a couple of fleeting moments back there I actually thought to myself that he could be a friend…

… But clearly this was god's latest way of telling me not to get too close to anyone yet again.

"Fine," I eventually whispered, my voice breaking slightly, as I turned my attention back to my book, the locket still held in one hand as I seeked its comfort once more.

As I read, I could have sworn that I saw Edward open his mouth to say something a couple of times, but it was probably my imagination. If he really wanted to say something I'm sure he would have.

The bell eventually rung and I shot up out of my seat, pretty much running out of the classroom in my haste to be the first to leave.

The rest of the day eventually passed and I repeated my movements from this morning, passing everyone with my head down, ignoring everything around me. Once again the only people who caught my eye was Edward and his friends… I noticed how they all walked in a group, seeming as happy as earlier. Though that wasn't really what got my attention… it was mainly Edward himself. He was being lead by the short pixie-like girl, and his expression didn't match the others at all.

It was what I always saw reflected back at me whenever I looked in the mirror…

Loneliness. Pain. Sadness. _Fear._

And it was then that I realised that Edward and I were more alike then I first thought.

And that he needed help just like I did.

… And _maybe_ I could be the one to do just that for him.

I pulled my hood over my head and began the walk down the rain covered streets heading towards my house that I know is still empty. I smiled to myself, going through my new plan in my head – my plan to help Edward… and myself.

Though at the time, as I walked through the rain to the place I hated to call home, I didn't know just how much it would change my life… in more ways then one.

* * *

_So yeah, hope you like it so far. Don't find it annoying that Edward's blind... I wanted to do something different apart from the normal vampires. This story will show the amazing things what people like him can do despite it all. And like I said... happy ending. ;D_

_Please review if you like this. _

_Thanks for reading! Emma.x_


	2. Broken

_A/N- Wow, I really wasn't expecting that response for the first chapter! I honestly didnt even think I would get one review, so it was really, really nice to see the reviews and alerts/faves - thanks so much! I'm replying to people right after I've posted this... aka now if you're reading this, haha. _

_Anyway... here's the second chapter. Hopefully it wasn't too long of a wait, I'll try and keep all the updates like this. Hope you like it!_

_Please review!_

* * *

"_Smile, though your heart is aching,  
__Smile, Even though it's breaking,  
__When there are clouds in the sky- you'll get by.  
__If you smile through your fear and sorrow,  
__Smile and maybe tomorrow,  
__You'll see the sun come shining through- For you._

_Light up your face with gladness,  
__Hide every trace of sadness,  
__Although a tear may be ever so near,  
__That's the time, you must keep on trying."_

_**Fearless**_

_**Chapter Two**_

One week passed by in a slow, almost painful matter. Nothing changed; nothing altered… not that I was expecting it to.

Everyday I walked the halls like I was a shadow, or just invisible, and then I would make my way to English – the one place where I felt like I wasn't. Because even though I spoke to no one, I knew that _he_ was paying attention to me, in some way or another.

Whenever I sat down his head would always turn in my attention – whether that was just because he was more wary, or not, I didn't know for sure. There would be so many times when I planned to talk to him, to put my plan into place… they were all perfect times, yet I just couldn't. He didn't seem to want to talk to me, and I hadn't yet mustered the confidence to say anything.

But as I sat down next to him everyday and took in his lonely, devastated expression, I couldn't help but wonder what had made him this way… what had made him blind, and so sad. My guess was that they were both linked… in some way or another… but if that were the case that would probably mean that he hadn't always been blind. He wouldn't be so sad if he had been born this way… because he wouldn't know any different.

But the idea of having sight… of having the ability to see the sunshine and what beauty the world had to offer and then losing it to the blackness… well that was an excruciating thought. It would be devastating and very lonely… and a good reason to feel so angry and depressed at everything.

… _A reason that could be considered as good as mine, if not better._

I shook my head to clear that train of thought, not wanting to go back on that route again, not yet. I was probably wrong about Edward anyway… I knew that I had to stop making these guesses about him and finally muster up the courage to apologise to him… to explain what I really meant.

I was currently in English, next to him… once again it was independent reading and note taking, yet the silence between us was almost painful. I rested my chin in my hand, taking a look around the classroom at the calendar and then out the window. I realised two things – firstly that today was a Wednesday, and for once it was sunny. However, to my annoyance, the clouds looked ready to cover it, and I somehow knew that by the time school was over that the sun would be gone. Typical, huh?

I sighed wistfully, knowing that it came out as more of a groan then what I had aimed for.

Edward's head turned slightly in my direction, his attention altering from his book to me. I blushed slightly, and focused back on my work, feeling embarrassed even though he couldn't see me.

It was then that I heard his soft voice for the first time in a week, "are you okay?"

I lifted my head up to look at him, noticing a confused and almost concerned expression on his beautiful face. Today his sunglasses were different, and actually showed a bit more of his face… apart from his eyes of course.

"I'm fine," I eventually whispered. "I'm just annoyed that's all."

Instantly a frown formed on his face at my words, "annoyed? Why?"

"Oh, its not over anything bad… just at the weather, that's all," I muttered, not failing to notice that my voice was shaking… probably due to the shock that we were talking again.

"Oh…" he murmured, his forehead creasing. "What's it like?"

"What?" I asked dumbly.

He let out a long breath, "The weather… what's it like today? I mean I know its not raining right now because I can't hear it… but surely it must be something bad to get you annoyed… I was just curious," he muttered, seeming almost embarrassed for asking.

Instantly a foreign feeling took over me… I hated seeing him upset, and I hated knowing that he couldn't just look out the window like I knew he would want to.

I looked past him out the window again; taking in how much lighter and prettier everything looked today. "It almost looks warm outside… the sun is out for once," I whispered softly.

He let out a soft sigh, clearly picturing it. "Why's that a bad thing?" he asked.

My thoughts were lost though… to another time when it was sunny like this… to a time where I was actually happy and able to enjoy it. "Because it won't last," I told him, my voice sad, giving away my emotions.

"Oh… I understand now," Edward murmured, not showing any signs of noticing my change in tone. "… But at least you got to see it though?"

I tried to smile at that thought but failed, "Yeah…" I replied, before realised what I had to do now. I had to finally apologise to him - "listen Edward, about last week… I really, honestly didn't mean what you thought I meant, you know when I made that stupid comment about going to an ordinary school," I stuttered out.

He nodded thoughtfully, "What did you mean then?" he asked quietly.

"I just meant that Fork's high is such an ordinary school… compared to the ones that are in Chicago." I told him honestly, "… I mean they must be so much better… much bigger, and they must have so many more facilities… I don't know. It was a stupid comment, and I'm sorry that you mistook it and it hurt you," I apologised sadly, remembering his expression from the other day.

He nodded, and let out another long breath- "I'm not going to lie, it did hurt… it was just that you seemed to understand what I felt when Mr. Greene thought I needed extra help, and so when you said that comment… I don't know why, but I just took it the wrong way. I've gotten used to people saying things like that, so…" he trailed off, as he moved so his head was facing the table, "I'm sorry, too much information."

"It's okay," I whispered.

He lifted his head back him, "You don't need to apologise, you know. I'm the one that's sorry for making that assumption about you. You're not like that and I'm sorry I jumped to conclusions," he whispered.

"Apology accepted," I replied instantly, my voice tender. The corner of his mouth lifted in what could be a smile, and I found myself smiling back, completely confused as to what was happening… I had spoken to him twice, and yet it seemed like so much more then that. The possibility of him being upset or mad at me was much more devastating then it should be – and I knew that I had to make sure that didn't happen.

And so, I spoke the truth - "You know what? I think we need a clean slate, we've spoken twice so far and all we've done is apologise," I sighed.

"I know, that's not good, huh?" he frowned.

I shook my head, "Nope… but it won't happen again, right?" I asked him, as I lightened up my voice a little.

"Right," he agreed, his voice matching mine.

I grinned and made a note to always think through what I was going to say to him from now on, so that I could avoid hurting him again. "So… I don't know about you, but this project is completely over my head. Think you could help me out in English from now on?"

He nodded, and then bit his lip, deep in thought - "Or… maybe we could actually be friends?" he asked slowly, hesitantly.

_Friends._

I hadn't had any friends in such a long time… I had vowed to never have them again, not feeling like I deserved it… but I knew that I couldn't pass this up. Edward was different… and there was no way I was going to say no to him.

And so, I reached out and grabbed his hand in mine, "Friends," I agreed, as I closed my fingers around his.

And then he smiled… it wasn't the first smile of his I had seen, but I knew that this one was different. Unlike the times with his family, it lit up his whole face, was genuine…

_And it was for me._

"_The broken clock is a comfort, it helps me sleep tonight,  
__Maybe it can stop tomorrow from stealing all my time.  
__And I am here still waiting though I still have my doubts,  
__I am damaged at best, like you've already figured out._

_I'm falling apart; I'm barely breathing…  
__With a broken heart that's still beating,  
__In the pain there is healing,  
__In your name I find meaning."_

The rest of that class passed quickly, mainly because there was no more silence, and no more awkwardness. As a matter of a fact it was far from that… it was nice. Having a friend I mean. I knew deep down that it wouldn't go further then that… I would have one friend who I would talk to in English class for the rest of the year, and then I would head of to college like planned.

Only… that was what I would keep telling myself at least. But I knew deep down that there was something more there with Edward… maybe not attraction but it was definitely something… it did seem like I cared too much too soon. Maybe it was compassion for his disability, or some sort of messed up guilt for hurting him… or maybe it wasn't. I knew that the third option was the most likely… it was the only one that seemed right to me. But for my sake and his I would convince myself that it was one of the others… I knew it wasn't a good idea to get close to someone again.

Still nonetheless, I still walked home with a smile on my face that afternoon – it was the first time I had done that in so long. I also noted that it hadn't started raining like I thought it would, and that most the clouds had just passed – leaving the sky a bright blue colour.

When I finally reached home I immediately noticed two other things – firstly that the cruiser was parked in the drive, meaning that Charlie was home early… and that there was a red Chevy truck parked next to it. I knew that none of Charlie's friends drove a car like this, so I was instantly curious as to why it was here.

The front door opened and Charlie stepped out; I walked up to him slowly, completely surprised and confused.

"What's this?" I asked curiously, gesturing to the truck.

He cleared his throat awkwardly; his infamous blush that I had inherited from him was out in force. "It's yours," he told me quietly.

I gasped in surprise, whirling around to look at it again. "Mine? You got me a truck?" I asked, surprised.

Charlie cleared his throat again, "Well, yeah. I know you've needed a car for a long time to get around, so I got this for you."

To say I was stunned would be an understatement. This was the most he had said to me in a year, and what he had done for me… it was amazing. I hadn't owned a car since… well, Phoenix, and I desperately needed one but didn't want to spend the money. It was very thoughtful of him to get one for me.

"Wow… I don't know what to say," I told him honestly.

He laughed a little at my awed expression, "Why don't you take a look at it," he suggested holding out the keys for me.

I thanked him and took them gratefully and pretty much ran down to the truck, figuring out how to unlock the door before climbing in. I sighed happily instantly loving it… admittedly it was of course very old, and many teenagers wouldn't want to be seen in it, but it was _perfect_ for me. The smell of coffee and tobacco and the small holes in the vinyl seats only added to the appeal as strange as that sounds. I also loved how loud the engine was when I started it… it was authentic, real, and I smiled at the thought of how many places it had been since it was made in the 50's.

I spent several minutes sitting in the cab, figuring out the pedals and the controls before climbing out with a huge grin on my face, thrilled at how well this day was going. I walked up to Charlie and thanked him multiple times.

But then the typical worry set in, "I just feel bad, it must have cost a lot…" I bit my lip anxiously.

He awkwardly scratched the back of his neck, "Erm, I actually got it for free…"

That interested me – nobody ever got things for _free_ nowadays after all. "Oh, really? Did you get it from someone then?" I asked him curiously.

He seemed reluctant to answer, but finally did - "Yeah… I got it from Billy Black."

I gasped in horror and surprise, "B-Billy? As in Jacobs -" I cut myself off, unable to say his name, "I-I can't accept t-this."

Charlie's expression grew sadder at my horrified one, "Don't be stupid Bells, he wanted me to give this to you, it was his idea," he muttered.

I shook my head, shaking off his idea - "I still can't accept it… I _won't_. Not after what happened…" I trailed off, as all the memories came back to me in quick, painful flashes.

_The bright lights…_

_The screeching of brakes…_

_The deep voice yelling my name…_

_The smashing of glass…_

_The white light in front of me, blurring into Charlie's heartbroken, worn expression as he told me what had happened…_

By now my legs and whole body was shaking – I had to lean against the truck to support myself. Somewhere through my reverie I could hear Charlie's voice talking, trying to soothe me and break me out of my spell I had been in so many times before -

"Bells… you know Billy doesn't blame you right?" he whispered gently, his voice softer then I had ever heard it. "He knows that things like this happens, and he doesn't blame you for what happened to Jake-"

Tears were now blinding my vision, making Charlie a blur in front of me. "How could he not? I blame myself!" I shouted, "It was _my_ fault!"

He tried to grab hold of me, but I somehow managed to get out of the way, stumbling as I did so. He sighed sadly, "Bella, accidents can happen to anybody, you need to stop blaming yourself, you need to try to move on. If not…"

I cut him off, annoyed that he just didn't understand what I was feeling. "What if I don't want to? I don't deserve it!" I screamed, as I turned and began heading towards the front door, wanting to be alone in my room.

"Bella!" Charlie called from behind me.

"Just leave me alone!" I screamed over my shoulder as I made my way through the front door. Once inside I quickly made my way upstairs, stumbling and banging into walls and doorframes as I did, due to my blurred vision.

I eventually made my way into my room, and after slamming the door behind me, curled up on my bed and I allowed myself to cry. It seemed like the grief was worse then ever before – because I had actually experienced some sort of happiness before having this harsh reminder of what my life really is. Loud, gut-wrenching sobs came from me, hurting my chest which was good – I wanted to feel the pain and certainly didn't want to feel numb.

Through my haze of tears I caught sight of the picture frame on my nightstand - the picture capturing the moment from another life ago. The picture of me and my best friend, so happy, so carefree, so free… and not afraid.

I lay there for hours, noticing the sky cloud over and turn into rain. And only then did I allow the darkness take over me once again as I cried myself into a restless, nightmare filled sleep.

The morning came, but I refused to move from my spot. I didn't go to school that day, or the day that followed it. I knew that there was no point… I had been in these types of moods before, and had attempted school… only to find it was worthless. So, I didn't even get out of bed this time. Charlie came into check on me several times, but never once suggested that I move – he knew that I needed to be alone and that trying to tell me otherwise would only cause an argument.

The weekend followed after that, but everything stayed the same. I barely moved from my position, and only noticed the changes in the days through the change in light and through the occasional need to sleep whenever night came. Eventually my thoughts grew clearer, and by Sunday night I was preparing myself for the next morning, knowing deep down that staying locked up here wouldn't solve anything… no matter how much I wanted it to.

It was around 11 in the morning on Monday when I finally pulled myself out of bed, forcing myself to take a shower and get ready for the last couple of hours of school. I didn't bother getting overdressed, or even looking at myself in the mirror, knowing that I wouldn't be faced with a pretty sight.

I walked to school again, not even looking at the truck as I passed by it on my way. I knew there was no way I could accept it – I knew that Charlie was just trying to do something nice for me, and while I did appreciate it and love the fact that he was making an effort. It just didn't seem fair to accept something like that - not when I knew who it came from, and the horrible circumstances leading up to all of this.

I closed my eyes leading myself to happier thoughts as best I could, not wanting to remember that night once again. Instead, I thought about the two benefits school would bring me – further education leading towards college, and my English class… which in other words means getting to see Edward again.

Admittedly, he hadn't crossed my mind at all these past few days – until early this morning. I remembered our conversation on Wednesday and how we had agreed to be friends and to help eachother in English, and I also remembered my promise to myself to help him be happy again.

… _Even though I needed so much help to be that myself. _

If I were to be completely honest with myself then I will admit this fact - he was the main reason I was bothering to come into school today. I knew that the education part was no problem – I could always catch up on what I had missed. But I didn't want to miss the opportunity to be his friend… or to help him.

And so, here I was.

The bell for lunch break rang just as I walked through the front doors, leading me towards the decision to just spend the hour in the library alone, catching up on what I had missed.

However that decision meant going to get my books out my locker first, which was luckily only a short walk. Once I got there, I noticed that Edward was standing a few lockers down, and smiled slightly at the sight of him looking as handsome as ever. He was leaning against one the lockers with his head down, while his sister while was putting her books away – and then as if she could sense me looking at them, her green eyes lifted up to meet mine, surprise and dismay written across her face. She turned to whisper something to Edward, causing me to sigh sadly imagining the words she could be saying.

'_She's a freak,'_

'_That weird girl is staring at us,'_

'_You should stay away from her,'_

… _Words I had heard before._

I pushed some of my hair behind my ears and focused my attention back on my task, opening my locker and then gathering what books I needed.

However, as I began putting them back in my bag I heard footsteps approaching me from my left – shy, cautious steps, as if the person was nervous somehow. And then once they were closer, I heard a soft voice that could only belong to one person speak my name –

"Bella?"

I looked up to see Edward standing about a foot from me, a slight smile on his face.

"Hi, Edward," I replied softly.

His smile widened, "Are you feeling better?" he asked me quietly.

He was obviously referring to how I wasn't in school. I knew I had to go along with it, pretending that I was only off because I was sick - "Erm, yeah… much better, thanks," I told him.

"Good, I'm glad," he told me gently, sincerity and kindness in his voice. "So… are you just heading to the cafeteria now?" he asked curiously.

The thought of food right now was nauseating, so I knew I had to stick to my original plan to avoid what could only be major embarrassment when I smelt the revolting food they served here. "Err, no, I'm not very hungry. I was thinking of just heading to the library, to study a little," I told him honestly.

He nodded as his smile became somewhat shy, "Do you want some company?" he asked quietly.

I blinked in surprise, "Really?"

He nodded, grinning - "Yeah… that's what friends do right?" he shrugged, as if it was something he suggested everyday.

I nodded as well, even though he couldn't see it. "Yeah, they do…" I replied thoughtfully, before realising I hadn't yet answered his question - "That would be really nice." I told him tenderly, meaning every word I spoke.

His smile grew even wider at my response, "Okay then," he replied, before turning around to face in the direction he came from – in other words, back to his sister. "I'll see you later, Alice."

His sister, aka Alice, was texting on her phone, but looked up at his voice, her eyebrows creasing in protective concern, "Will you be okay?" she asked worriedly.

I could imagine he was rolling his eyes right now. "I'll be _fine_," he muttered, in a soft yet annoyed tone.

She didn't seem fazed by his tone though, and instead a bright smile lit up her beautiful face as she glanced in between us both. "Okay… I'll see you later then!" she told him enthusiastically, before turning and almost skipping down the corridor towards the cafeteria.

I felt bad for judging her earlier and for assuming that she would say horrible things about me – she clearly cared about Edward a lot, and seemed like a really nice, fun person to be around. I knew that my assumptions were right about a lot of people here… that was proven when I started a year ago, but I was clearly wrong about her.

Once she was gone, Edward turned back to face me, the smile on his face now crooked and even more beautiful then before. "Well… lead the way then," he grinned, getting ready to unfold his cane.

I smiled gently at him, and boldly reached out and grabbed his hand, intertwining our fingers. "You won't need that, just hold onto my hand," I whispered softly, hoping that he wouldn't be offended or hurt in anyway – perhaps he liked using his cane more then holding onto someone… I didn't know for sure yet.

But to my surprise and relief, his warm hand squeezed mine gently, "thank you," he whispered.

I knew that there was a lot of meaning behind those two words – he was of course grateful for the help, but was also grateful for the acceptance… because his disability didn't bother me. And it didn't make me see him in any negative way – only in a positive way actually due to my admiration for him.

I almost felt like thanking him too… because he was helping me. I had just spent a miserable, alone four days, where none of my thoughts or ideas were even close to making me feel happy again. But just with seeing him, and hearing his concern, and with holding his warm hand and knowing I would have his company for the next couple of hours was enough to break me out of my spell.

… It was enough to give me optimism, to think that maybe things might just be okay.

And then I realised… this relationship wasn't just because he needed me to save him, nor was it that I needed him to save me…

It was because we might just save eachother.

* * *

_So yeah I know there are still a lot of things to be explained. Such as what exactly happened to Bella, and why Edward's blind... things like that will all be answered very soon. Remember I'm only planning for this story to be 10 chapters - 15 tops if I get too carried away haha. So yeah, things will move along pretty quickly. _

_Once again, I still know its a bit sad, and some of you want a happy ending for Edward but are wondering how that will happen... just stick with it. I'm promising a super happy, fluffy ending, you'll just have to wait to find out whether or not Edward will see again! No matter what it will be happy though!_

_Please review if you liked this!_

_Thanks for reading.. Emma.x_


	3. Dreaming

_A/N - Hii, thanks again for the lovely reviews, I'm writing to everyone now! I'm honestly still so surprised at peoples reaction to this story, its amazing. Just hoping that it keeps up, thanks again though!_

_So yeah, here's the third chapter, and the one thats got me the most nervous so far... I'm really worried people won't like it. But yeah, I had to post it at some point, so here goes nothing, eh? _

_If you do like this chapter, please review!_

* * *

"_You don't know about my past.  
__And I don't have a future figured out.  
__And maybe this is gone too fast.  
__And maybe it's not meant to last,_

_But what do you say to taking chances,  
__What do you say to jumping off the edge?  
__And never knowing if there's solid ground below.  
__Or a hand to hold. Or hell to pay._

_What do you say? What do you say?  
__I just wanna start again,  
__Maybe you can show me how to try.  
__Maybe you could take me in,  
__Somewhere underneath your skin."_

_**Fearless**_

_**Chapter three**_

The more I got to know Edward, the more I _wanted_ to know.

I learnt the important things, such as the date of his birthday, and about his family… that Emmett was his twin (something that surprised me,) and that Alice was their younger sister, and a junior. I learnt that he had moved here during the summer because his parents Carlisle and Esme felt that small town life would suit them better. He told me that Alice and Emmett ended up befriending Rosalie and Jasper, whom he felt didn't like him very much, which was something I was surprised at – who wouldn't like Edward if they got to know him?

I knew that I did… more then I should.

We kept up our routine of hanging out at lunch, whether we were in the library or the cafeteria on my infamous table; we always spent it together. I knew that secrets were kept… I hadn't yet mustered up the confidence to ask him how he ended up blind, and also hadn't told him the real reason why I came to Forks. I hadn't actually told him much, just that I was an only child, and that my parents split up when I was four causing me to move to Phoenix with my mom Renee until a year ago.

But it didn't seem like any of that really mattered. It didn't feel like we were keeping up some sort of pretence everytime we spoke, or spent time together… no, it felt different then that.

I couldn't quite figure out what it was that I was feeling, all I knew was that I had never felt this way about anyone…

Well, only one person came close, but he's gone now, and I refuse to let myself cry yet again… because Edward's near me.

He was once again standing with his family at the lockers, but as I approached, Alice nudged him and told him I was here – something she had been doing for the past week and a half. He then looked up, like he normally did, and turned his head in my direction, and almost like he could actually see me… that beautiful smile would grace his face as he held his hand out for me.

I interlaced my fingers with his, squeezing them once – another of our new routines.

He smiled wider, and turned so he was leaning against the locker facing me, "Hey," he whispered.

"Hey yourself," I grinned, "you okay?"

He shrugged slightly, his smile soft - "I'm better now, you?"

"Same," I whispered. "Did you have a good weekend?" I asked – it was Monday after all, two days since I had last seen him.

He shrugged slightly, "Yeah… it wasn't bad, except for my mom's dinner party that is," he muttered.

I raised my eyebrow, "Oh yeah?" I asked, hinting at an explanation.

His smile turned crooked, "Yeah, she had me as her official food taster- I lost count of how many casseroles I had to eat," he muttered bitterly, though I could detect humour somewhere in his voice.

I cringed at the thought of that though, "Casserole…? Yuck." I scrunched up my face in disgust.

He laughed quietly, "my thoughts exactly," he murmured, running his free hand through his dishevelled hair.

… I ignored the sudden urge I had to replace his hand for my own.

"What about you?" Edward asked quietly, his attention back on me, "did you do much this weekend?"

I also shrugged, "Studied a little, preparing for the dreaded Biology exam this week," I told him vaguely.

He gasped quietly, "Ah… I completely forgot about that!"

I laughed slightly, nudging his side gently with my elbow, "Me too, until Saturday… so, want to continue with our study sessions?" I asked him hopefully.

He grinned, "Yes, definitely… want to go to the library for lunch again then?"

I was just about to answer when a loud throat clearing stopped me – I glanced over Edward's shoulder to see Alice smiling at us.

"Sorry about that," she apologised, "but I was just going to ask if you wanted to sit with us at lunch today?"

The suggestion clearly looked appealing to Edward, but I was dubious… I didn't know any of these people save for Edward, and I'll admit that I didn't intend too… these people seemed intimidating.

But, they were friends and family of Edward's… I knew that saying no would probably hurt him. He would obviously want a change of just spending lunch with me… he was probably desperate for more interesting company.

"Erm, sure, sounds good," I agreed.

Alice grinned, and Edward gave me a grateful smile, temporarily making me confident about this decision… well, until I caught sight of Rosalies expression that is. She was staring at me, not with a curious expression… but with outright hostility, like she didn't trust me…

_Or more like she hated me. _

I flinched, not used to an emotion like that being directed at me… because until now everyone had always ignored me, and for all I knew they didn't hate me at all… well, that was what I liked to tell myself. I had never and still didn't cope well with being hated. And all the times that I stayed in the shadows I didn't have to deal with that, because everyone was oblivious to me, they didn't care at all.

_So now that I was coming out of the shadows, I wonder - is it worth it?_

I glanced around at everyone noticing how they were deep in conversation – Alice was jumping up and down excitedly clapping her hands, while Jasper smiled down at her. Emmett was laughing along, while Rosalie… well her expression was still icy, but she seemed to be contributing to what they were saying at least.

I sighed sadly, thinking for just one split moment that none of this was worth it, and that maybe I should go back to the way I was… when Edward stopped those thoughts.

His hand squeezed mine gently, so I turned to look at him, noticing for the first time that he wasn't involved in the conversation either… he was acting like an outsider like I was.

He smiled down at me, "want to go for a walk before class?" he asked me quietly.

"Yes!" I instantly replied, before realising that my response was probably a _little_ too enthusiastic.

He didn't seem to notice though, as he only continued to smile, and tugged me gently along with him, saying goodbye to the rest of the group as we began walking hand in hand.

I lead him outside; secretly loving the fact that he was comfortable with me… that he trusted me not to get him lost, or lead him astray. We walked slowly across the grass, heading towards where I knew his first class was.

I smiled as the warm breeze ran through my hair, "It's sunny today," I whispered gently, going into another of our routines- me explaining the weather that is. I smiled up at him, "you can probably feel the warmth right?"

He nodded, his expression the happiest I had ever seen it, "Mm, it's nice," he murmured.

"It is," I agreed, before sighing, "The winters coming though, so I'm not expecting many more days like this."

"It doesn't matter," he whispered softly, squeezing my hand. "Because before we know it, it'll be summer again, and then…" he trailed off.

"Graduation… and then college…" I finished his sentence gently.

He nodded, his expression tightening, "Yeah…"

"Are you applying for anywhere?" I asked curiously, as our pace slowed.

He thought through what he was going to say, and when he did speak his voice was surprisingly soft - "I don't know… how do I know anywhere would even accept me? And I know that if I do go that I'll need someone to help me around, and I don't want to be a burden…"

I cut him off sharply, "You are _not_ a burden," I told him, "You'll _never_ be a burden," I whispered, shocked that he would ever think that.

He nodded, but didn't make a comment on what I had said… he didn't actually say anything.

I hated seeing him so disheartened, so I spoke what I thought was the truth in an attempt to help him feel more positive - "I think you should apply," I whispered, "You're just as smart as everyone else, if not smarter… and with everything considered that is pretty amazing. Any college that rejects you, isn't worth going to… at least that's what I think."

We had stopped walking by that point, and his face was surprised as it faced in my direction, "You really think that?" he asked breathlessly, his voice incredulous.

I nodded, "Of course I do," I told him, sincerity ringing out in my voice.

My words clearly had some huge effect on him, as he did something that completely surprised me… he wrapped his arms around me and pulled me into a gentle hug, burying his face into my hair.

I was completely still for a moment, not expecting this at all. And then I tried to remember the last time I'd had contact like this with anyone… it was a long time ago - a year to be exact.

My fears were increasing… I didn't want to lose this feeling. I didn't want to end up broken again, and opening myself… I knew that I was possibly setting myself up for a fall.

But the brave side of me argued – _who cares?_ I had never felt anything as strong, as wonderful as this…

… _And I wouldn't give up this feeling for the world. _

And so, I returned the hug just as tightly, resting my head on his shoulder, breathing in his soft, sweet scent. It was unlike anything I had ever smelt before… it was _him_… it was _perfect._

I felt him press his nose gently into my hair, and then his lips replace them - "You're such a good friend to me, you know that?" he whispered sweetly, squeezing me to him.

"I do," I whispered back, "… and the feelings mutual, believe me. You're my best friend," I told him; ignoring the warning bells those two words set off in my mind.

… Because I wanted to enjoy this moment, for just a little longer.

"_When I fall asleep leave my door open just a crack, Please take me away from here,  
__'Cause I feel like such an insomniac, Please take me away from here,  
__Why do I tire of counting sheep? Please take me away from here…  
__When I'm far too tired to fall asleep._

_To ten million fireflies, I'm weird 'cause I hate goodbyes,  
__I got misty eyes as they said farewell…  
__but I'll know where several are, if my dreams get real bizarre,  
__'cause I saved a few and I keep them in a jar._

_I fall asleep… I'd like to make myself believe that planet earth turns slowly…  
__It's hard to say that I'd rather stay awake when I'm asleep,  
__Because my dreams are bursting at the seams."_

It was a stormy night tonight – just like I thought it would be. It meant that the warm, sunny weather was over, and that the winter was truly coming. Isn't that what storms usually symbolised anyway? … That the heat, the weather, the earth must shift… and come crashing back down at some point, because nothing can last forever.

It took me a long time to fall asleep… the thunder was loud, and the lightening kept erupting my room in a bright light, that was hard to ignore. I tried everything I could short from counting sheep, and eventually after an hour or so I became unaware of what was happening and drifted into a uncomfortable sleep… uncomfortable because of how real my dreams felt.

It was like they were actually happening… I could almost smell the change in the air, and hear the crowds around me, and feel the sensations on my fingertips… and for now… tonight, this dream was real.

… _The crowds were increasing; the dull place I was standing in only became even greyer, seeming dark as I stood alone, listening to the announcements being made over a speaker. I couldn't hear exactly what was being said, but somehow knew the message… I knew what was happening. _

_I began walking forward, shoving my way past people as best I could to little avail. Something was pulling me forward, I didn't know what it was… but knew that I couldn't stop. _

_As I was shoved backwards once again, I finally felt ready to give up… to just turn around. But then suddenly, like the sound of a wave crashing the crowd parted, allowing me the sight of someone. _

_I could tell who it was… even from this distance. His smile was brilliant, and he had the most stunning green eyes… that seemed to be shining as he spotted me. _

_It was Edward._

_He could see me. _

"_Bella," he whispered softly – his voice clear over the crowd despite the quiet volume. _

_He began walking towards me, his walk confident and brave – he wasn't afraid of the crowds, and certainly knew where he was going without his restrictions. _

"_Edward," I breathed, as I began a sprint towards him, finding that I was suddenly no longer afraid – the crowds were gone, and we were now outside, in the brilliant bright sunshine. _

_We were only a few feet away, literally a couple of steps… so, so close, almost close enough to touch… when it happened. _

_The white light appeared in front of me, blinding my vision, as a horrible squealing sound filled my ears… a sound that was almost like screaming. I placed my hand over my ears, but was unable to block out the loud crashing sound, despite my best efforts. _

_Everything suddenly turned into agony… I opened my eyes to darkness, to a smashed windscreen… I started screaming for Edward, looking around frantically, and praying that he was okay._

_Please, someone… let him be okay. _

_Only, as I turned my head, I noticed the dark figure next to me… and it wasn't Edward, I was certain of that. I reached my shaking hands up, rubbing the dark liquid away that was covering my eyes. _

_And then as my vision cleared I finally realised._

_It was Jacob next to me._

_My first, my true best friend._

_His eyes were barely open, as he told me to run… to get away… I refused of course, as I desperately tried to help him in any way that I could. I ran my hands over his face, making sure his beautiful, dark eyes were clear for me to see. _

_Only as I cleared them once again, his face was suddenly wiped clean. His expression suddenly turned angry or hurt even as he whispered – _

"_Tell him the truth."_

I shot up clutching my chest, trying to calm my breaths and the tears that were now running down my face. I blinked several times, trying to remember where I was and what was happening.

Eventually things became clear and I realised… I was in my bedroom in Fork's, it was now Tuesday morning. And I had just dreamt of something that had happened… and something that might possibly never happen.

It was the first time I had dreamt of Edward, but certainly not the first time Jacob had appeared in my dreams. I had dreamt of the ending scenario many, many times in the past year, how could I not after all? But it was the first time Jacob had said those four words to me.

And the way I heard them… it really was like he was talking to me.

I looked out of my window at the rain that was pouring down – figures. The sunshine had gone even quicker then I had thought. That didn't matter though - because today I was going to do something positive, something I'd never done.

… And that was to tell the complete truth of what happened that night a year ago.

Edward may hate me, or he might just understand… it was a gamble, but I knew I had to take it. This was a part of my past, and would always be a part of me; there was no way we could continue with this friendship now until I told him about this.

I made my way to school with a clearer, determined mind. The horror of the dream was pushed back, and instead I smiled as I considered the possibility that this could help in the healing process. I had never told anyone in detail what had happened, Edward would be the first – and I knew it would be a relief to finally say it out loud.

So, instead of facing another day at the lunch table with Alice's gossip, and Rosalie's ice cold glare, I just asked Edward if we could meet alone… so that I could get this over with.

I lead him to a bench that faced the forest – it was secluded enough that no one would over hear our conversation, but also wasn't too far of a walk in case I had to help him back all of a sudden.

… If he decided to hate me after I told him that is.

I took in a shuddering breath, nervous all of a sudden, knowing that there was no way I could back out now. "I have something to tell you," I whispered, unable to look at him.

"Yeah, I kind of guessed that," Edward whispered, reaching for my hand. "It's okay, you know. Whatever it is, just tell me."

"It's not that easy," I whispered sadly, squeezing his hand once as he threaded out fingers together. "I've tried so hard to hold this story in… but I feel like I'm going to burst if I don't tell someone…" I trailed off, watching the trees gently sway in the breeze. The rain had cleared slightly now, but the clouds were thick – I knew it wouldn't be long until the rain started again.

Edward moved slightly closer to me, "It'll be okay," he whispered soothingly, rubbing his thumb over my knuckles.

"Okay…" I breathed, knowing that I had no choice now. He was my friend… and at the same time he was so much more then that… he was slowly becoming everything to me.

… And he deserved the truth.

"I didn't come to Fork's to spend time with my dad," I told him shakily. "A-About a year ago, I, we were in an accident… I…" I cut off, aware of how badly my voice was shaking.

Edward let go of my hand, and moved his arm to rest around my shoulder… it was nice, soothing. "It's fine," he whispered, his breath warm on my neck.

He was calming me, but ultimately telling the story still devastated me - "It's not… It was my fault Edward! If I just focused, he would still be here…" I sobbed.

"Who would?" Edward frowned in confusion.

"Jacob… my best friend," I whispered sadly, "I killed him, Edward. I killed my best friend!"

* * *

_Next chapter = Bella's back-story. Once that is out we'll get on to the happier/more romantic stuff… just after a little more angst that is. There's a tiny little bit of foreshadowing in this chapter for all those that like those kind of things (I know I always have when reading stories!) _

_So yeah, still so many questions to be answered. All to be done very soon now! I'm surprised, but this story is actually fitting in really well to my outline… I'm almost certain this story will be 10 chapters now. 11 possibly. __It will be complete very soon!_

_So yeah, please review! And thanks for reading… Emma.x_


	4. Truth

_A/N- Hii, thanks again for all the reviews, I'm so excited that we're almost at 50! Seriously though, I'm really loving all the nice comments, so thanks so much - writing to everyone now like usual!_

_Anyway, heres chapter four... really hope you all like it again. _

_If you like this chapter, please review... it only takes a few seconds as compared to the hours it took me to write this chapter!_

* * *

"_Up with your turret, aren't we just terrified?  
__Shale, screen your worry from what you won't ever find,  
__Don't let it fool you Don't let it fool you... down,_

_Down's sitting round, folds in the gown.  
__Sea and the rock below, cocked to the undertow,  
__Bones blood and teeth erode, with every crashing node.  
__Wings wouldn't help you; wings wouldn't help you... down,  
__Down fills the ground, gravity's proud._

_You barely are blinking, wagging your face around,  
__When'd this just become a mortal home?_

_Won't, won't, won't, won't… won't let you talk me…  
__Won't let you talk me down, will pull it taut, nothing let out."_

_**Fearless**_

_**Chapter Four**_

I didn't even look over at Edward to see his reaction – knowing it would stop my story before I had even begun explaining it.

And so, as I turned my attention to my lap, I started my story with a shaky voice - "It happened just over a year ago… you see, Jacob and I were really close. And even though I lived in Phoenix, ever since I was young I have always spent all of my summers here with Charlie. That was how I met Jacob – he lived in La Push and his dad, Billy was Charlie's best friend, so they always encouraged us being friends. Not that it was difficult…"

I paused then and took a chance, looking up to see Edward's expression. His face was the epitome of calm, but there was still some curiosity and shock in there. I knew that he was the right person to tell… because he would listen.

I cleared my throat, "A-Anyway, it was last June, and my mom and Charlie had a huge argument – it was over something stupid, but it made my mom, Renee, decide that I wasn't going to Fork's that summer. It was of course really bad for me… I never really had many friends in Phoenix, so the thought of not getting to see my best friend was devastating… I, of course threw the typical teenage tantrum, thinking it was unfair that she was stopping me over some petty argument that didn't even involve me… but she still refused to budge." I frowned slightly at the memory of Renee, and the bad relationship we now had for many reasons beyond this.

I shook my head clearing my thoughts, and almost as if Edward knew what was going on in my mind, he reached out, searching until he found my hand and then threaded our fingers together. I managed to smile slightly at that, feeling slightly stronger with his comforting touch - "I eventually accepted it, and planned to get a summer job instead… but then one day I got a huge surprise. You see, Jacob decided to come and visit me instead…"

- I paused for a moment feeling the tears begin to collect in my eyes before returning to the story -

"And it was great… we spent our time at the beach, enjoying the warm weather that Fork's doesn't exactly offer. Renee had bought me a car the year before for my 16th, so we spent most of our time driving out places…" I sighed at the memory of the summer that was so amazing… and that wasn't.

"One day… the day before he was due to leave, we had gone far out of town, and were driving back. Jacob and I… well, we ended up arguing, he wanted me to move to Forks because…" I trailed off, deep in my sad memories.

I didn't say anything for a long time, which prompted Edward to gently urge me on - "Because…?"

I sighed sadly, as the first tear finally fell, stinging as it slipped down my cheek, "B-Because he believed that our friendship could be more. I didn't agree, because I only, and have only ever thought of him as my best friend… my brother. But yeah, he clearly thought differently which caused an argument… because I was tired of him putting pressure on me, and he was tired of waiting. And anyway… the weather kept getting worse, it was like a tropical storm… very rare for Phoenix." I cringed at the thought of that – why did it have to rain so much on _that_ night?

"… The roads were covered in water, and everything became a blur after that… because I was so focused on the argument I hit a big puddle and the car lost control… I don't remember much, just Jacob screaming at me to hold on… and there was a lot of noise, like crashing… the breaking of glass…" I whispered, squeezing Edward's hand for reassurance – his gentle squeeze in return helped a lot.

"And then there was the horrible, _horrible_ pain. The car ended up flipping off the side of the road, and the impact had caused… well, the car was destroyed to say the last… and there was so much blood everywhere…

It was dark, but I could still make out Jacob next to me… he was in a much worse state then me, I knew that right away. It was horrifying… to see how much pain he was in… but he was still conscious… and he knew Edward, he knew he was going to die!"

But he begged me to run… to get away… I didn't know why at the time, so I refused. I stayed by his side despite the pain and the smell of blood and burning metal. And… he…" I wiped the tears away, only for them to be quickly replaced.

"He told me that he loved me and that he was sorry, and before I had a chance to say anything back, he died. H-He died, right next to me…" I sobbed, as the tears began falling even faster then before.

Edward wrapped his free arm around my shoulder, pulling me against his side as I continued with the rest of the story - "I don't remember much from there, only me trying to get him to wake up, hoping against hope that he was just asleep or something like that. And then everything went hazy and I woke up a week later in hospital, with little memory. Only then, Renee explained everything that happened… and it all became so clear that I went hysterical and the doctors had to sedate me. I just couldn't believe that he was dead… that I would never see him again…" I whispered sadly, remembering the feelings of pure agony and disbelief.

"The times after Jacob's death were extremely difficult, for the first few months I became lifeless… so much so that Renee decided she couldn't cope with me anymore so sent me here – the place where he lived of all places! It just made things worse at first…" I laughed bitterly, feeling the anger at my mother rise once again.

I eventually pushed the angry feelings aside though, and explained a bit more- "Once I started coming to my senses a little bit, I blamed Renee for all of it at first, telling her it was her fault. If she would've let me go to Fork's, Jacob wouldn't have come. And then I actually blamed Jacob... as horrible as that sounds. I mean if he wouldn't have insisted on us being more and then come to visit me… yeah; he would still have his life.

But all that very quickly changed, and I blamed myself… I mean, what if I had paid attention? What if I had stopped the argument? What if I had insisted on going to Fork's instead… he would still be alive. I still blame myself to today… because it is my fault." I murmured.

"No, Bella…" Edward whispered, his voice shocked.

I wouldn't let him feel any type of pity for me though. "Don't say that, I know it is! Charlie doesn't ever talk to me, and if he does its only small talk… its because he doesn't know what to say. He thought the world of Jacob and blames me for his death… I know he does. And I also I know its my fault everytime I see Billy in town and see the pain reflected in his eyes. Did you know the other day that Billy actually gave me a truck? It was a truck Jacob worked on… he wanted me to have it so things would be easier for me. You know, to help with getting to school and work… how unfair is that? They're talking about making things easier for me… I don't deserve it!" I screamed, feeling myself growing hysterical.

My story was now over, and I allowed the emotions to take over me, as I prepared myself for Edward to now tell me he was disgusted. And that he didn't want to be my friend anymore because of what I had done.

… Only… that wasn't what happened at all.

"Bella, please listen to me," Edward begged as he grabbed my face in his hands and rested his forehead against my own, "It was _not_ your fault… these accidents can happen to anybody! It was just bad luck that was all. You cannot carry on with your life blaming yourself – Jacob wouldn't have wanted that, would he? Just because that happened to him, doesn't mean that you can't have a life yourself…" he sighed sadly.

I didn't know what to say to that… his words did make sense to me though, and I knew somewhere deep down that he was right, but couldn't find it in me to actually agree with him.

So he continued talking instead, his nose rubbed against mine and his breath brushed across my face as he whispered sadly - "Life is so precious, why do you want to waste it?"

I closed my eyes slowly, feeling tired and weary now that the tears had stopped falling. And then I finally whispered in a broken, helpless voice -"_I'm afraid."_

He didn't seem too fazed as his nose nuzzled mine though, "Of what?" he asked me gently.

"Of things like that happening… of so many things," I told him truthfully.

He frowned slightly, "But if you live your life in fear, then how are you going to live at all?" he asked me gently.

I let out a soft breath, "You're so brave to say that," I told him sweetly, knowing that I wasn't really answering his question.

But once again it didn't bother him, "Why do you think that?" he asked, as one of his hands moved slightly further back so it was slightly buried in my hair.

I smiled at his gesture, loving the feel of his gentle touch… it was unlike anything I had ever experienced before. "Because you can't see… it means that you don't know what's coming, you just go for it… you don't let yourself be afraid," I told him gently, praying that he wouldn't take offence.

He only shrugged though, "I don't anymore."

I nodded, knowing that he would feel the movement. We were then silent for a while, as his hands continued to gently stroke my hair and face, and as I thought his words through… and wondered whether it could possibly relate to me.

_In other words… maybe somehow, someday… I wouldn't be afraid. _

I smiled, as my eyes watered a little – due to the happiness I was now feeling, it was such a contradiction as compared to the emotion I was feeling not five minutes ago. And it was all because of him - "Thank you for listening… and for not hating me," I told him.

His expression became puzzled, but there was also a sweet, confused smile on his face as he asked - "Why on earth would I hate you?"

"Because of the story I just told you…?" I replied – though it came out as more of a question then a statement.

He sighed, and I could almost imagine him rolling his eyes right now. "Honestly Bella for such a smart girl you sure can be dense," he said teasingly, his voice nothing but kind. "I wouldn't hate you for that… I don't think I could _ever_ hate you."

I felt myself melting at his sweet words, "Well, thank you for that… for listening I mean," I thanked him.

"You're welcome," he grinned, before lowering his voice slightly - "… I think you should accept the truck by the way."

"You do?" I asked quietly, before taking his words in, and remembering what he had said earlier… how life should be appreciated. "I'll think about it," I promised him.

"Good," he smiled, as his hand returned to his previous movements through my hair.

I smiled at the beautiful man in front of me – _could he be any more perfect?_ He was wonderful in every way… I lifted my eyes, examining every part of his face when I came across his dark glasses, and remembered what was hidden behind them. "Can I ask you something?" I whispered.

"Of course," he whispered, his voice so tender that I wondered what he was thinking in that moment.

I was going to ask how he had come to be blind, but decided that perhaps that was a conversation for a different time – I would ask soon, but I was enjoying this lighter side of us. I felt like I had been on an emotional rollercoaster with so many highs and lows, and I loved the highs… the times when I would think that everything might just be okay.

_Times like now._

So instead I asked a slightly lighter question, which still made me nervous nonetheless - "C-Can I see your eyes?" I whispered.

He sighed, and I thought that he would instantly say no, but he ended up surprising me - "do you promise not be freaked out?" he asked quietly.

"Why would I be freaked out?" I frowned.

One of his hands dropped from my cheek, and rested at his side. "People think its weird… to see my eyes looking at them but know that they're not seeing anything," he explained sadly.

"I promise I won't get freaked out… I just… I just want to see them, to see them as you talk to me." I insisted.

He nodded, "go ahead then, if you promise not to get freaked out… I really don't mind," he told me sincerely, proving that he really didn't mind – which made this easier for me.

I once again promised that I wouldn't, knowing that I was once again telling the complete truth to him. And then I slowly raised my hands up, so not to startle him and gently pulled the glasses away from his face…

Only to see beautiful, emerald green eyes looking back at me, which were the same from my dreams.

"_You're so beautiful,  
__With an edge and charm but so careful,  
__When I'm in your arms._

_Cause you're working,  
__Building a mystery,  
__Holding on and holding it in.  
__Yeah you're working,  
__Building a mystery,  
__And choosing so carefully._

_You're building a mystery."_

I honestly didn't know what to expect when I saw his eyes, all I knew was that it wasn't this. His eyes, _his beautiful eyes_… seemed like they really were looking right at me, as if they were seeing right into my soul. They glistened in the light, and gave away so much emotion… that I really wouldn't know he was blind if I had just looked at him.

I looked at the rest of his face compared to them, and noticed just how much they completed him. They matched his pale skin, and bronze hair perfectly, and I noticed how they were almost the same as his twin Emmett's… and so much different at the same time.

The green seemed so much more vivid… and the emotion showing through them… there was so much pain, obviously reflected through the times leading up to now. But mixed in with that was also so much happiness and… _hope._

_The same emotions that were probably reflected in my own eyes right now. _

"Bella?" he whispered, his voice nervous, not knowing what my reaction was.

I tried to think of many words, telling him that I wasn't freaked out at all, that he was so normal, so perfect… but instead all I managed to whisper was, "You're _beautiful."_

His eyebrows raised in disbelief, and he began to bow his head, but I placed my hands on his cheeks stopping him. I then slowly raised his head back up and ran my thumbs gently along his cheekbones, and just under his eyelids.

"I meant what I said… your eyes are beautiful… you are."

"Beautiful was hardly the word I was expecting but thanks anyway," he replied softly, teasingly. He then gently grasped my hands and pulled them around his neck. Once we were closer his arms wrapped around my waist, and pulled me to him so close that there was barely an inch between us.

_It was amazing how well we fit together. _

I was now completely different from earlier on… in every possible way. Getting over what had happened, and losing Jacob was still going to affect me, and I knew I was far from moving on… but this was a step, a very positive step in fact. More days like this might just help me get there… clearly keeping my emotions bottled up wasn't the answer like I had thought for so long. Instead, letting them all out seemed to help so much more.

I held on to Edward even tighter, once again grateful for him, and then laughed as a quick thought shot through me - "It's funny how we started off always apologising to eachother but now we're always thanking eachother," I whispered against his shoulder.

He laughed slightly, his breath tickling my neck gently - "I guess we just have a lot to be grateful for… now that we have eachother," he whispered as his voice now grew slightly shy.

"You're right," I agreed eagerly, wanting him to let know I felt the same to stop him from feeling nervous. I then lowered my voice, and whispered my thoughts as a blush formed over my cheeks - "_You're all I have now_."

I thought that my voice was too quiet to possibly here, and almost had that thought confirmed, but then to my surprise and joy Edward moved his face slightly, and leant in so his lips brushed my cheek gently.

Once, twice… _three times_.

* * *

_Next chapter = they grow closer, Bella makes a big move towards healing, might find out some of Edward's past. We'll mostly be getting happier from here... there will be a couple of bumps in the road, but nothing too major, just a bit of cuteness and then the HEA. _

_Anyway, really hope you all liked this chapter! Please review if you did!_

_Thanks for reading... Emma.x_


	5. Feelings

_A/N- Hii, once again thank you so much for the reviews! I'm really overwhelmed with the love for this story, and really grateful. I'm once again writing to everyone now!_

_So yeah, here's chapter five. It's the longest chapter so far, but there was a lot to fit in... I didn't want to cut it down at all. So, yeah, hope you all like it. I won't say anything else... just go ahead with reading it if you want!_

_If you do like it, please review.. it really does mean a lot._

* * *

"_It don't matter to the sun  
__If you go or if you stay.  
__No, the sun is gonna rise, gonna rise,  
__Shine down on an another day.  
__There will be tomorrow,  
__Even if you choose to leave,  
__'Cause it don't matter to the sun no, no,  
__It matters to me._

_It ain't gonna stop the world,  
__If you walk out that door,  
__This old world just keeps spinning round, spinning round,  
__Like it did the day before.  
__'Cause to them it makes no difference,  
__It just keeps on keeping time,  
__'Cause it ain't gonna stop the world no,  
__But it'll be the end of mine."_

_**Fearless **_

_**Chapter Five**_

More days passed, and things only continued to get better and better. I knew that if I really thought about everything, and how my life was now, that I would be filled with panic that everything would suddenly go downhill again. … But I'm refusing to let myself do that. Telling the truth to Edward had really turned everything around… I now allowed myself to believe in what he had said, and as a result we were growing even closer then ever. I no longer dreaded school, because I knew I wasn't going to be ignored – I had him now. Admittedly, he was all that I had but that was okay with me. _Because he was more then I ever thought that I'd have. _

However, we were currently stuck at just seeing eachother for 15 minutes before first class, and for lunch and English class. It was always great, but didn't seem like enough somehow – it felt like our time was always cut short somehow, like it was meant to be more.

… And I was now on my way to change that.

It was a Saturday today, so luckily for me, Charlie wasn't at work today. I found him downstairs on the sofa watching some baseball game. He looked up when I entered the room, but didn't say anything – we hadn't really spoken much since the whole truck incident, which was another reason why I was about do this… I knew I finally had to start making things right.

It was another step towards healing… towards being better again.

I cleared my throat, causing him to jump slightly in his seat. He then turned round to look at me, and before he said anything I managed to ask him nervously - "Hey, dad – could I ask for a favour?"

He looked completely shocked, but also pleased at the same time, obviously because this was one of the first times I had actually started a conversation with him in a long time - "Uh, sure. What is it?" he asked gruffly.

I shifted on my feet, somewhat nervous to ask this question, even though I had no doubt in my mind that it was absolutely the right thing to do - "Could you take me to Billy's? I _really _need to talk to him."

The reservation was just like I remembered it. I hadn't seen Jacob's house, or anywhere in La Push for that matter in a couple of years - since the Summer before Jacob came to Phoenix - so I guess that deep down I expected something to be different. But no… the house was still small and red, and looked in desperate need of repair, but still had that mystical, unusual look to it – it was a place I had spent most of my summers in, and had always loved.

… And it was weird that nothing had changed.

There was no real evidence that Jacob was even gone… everything seemed the same. But despite that, there was still that empty feeling in the air there was something so special, so important missing – someone who once upon a time was the world to me.

I felt a strange mix of emotions as I stepped out of the cruiser onto the dry grass; it was almost like acceptance… a strange calmness. I had expected to feel more pain then this… I guessed that it hadn't really sunk in yet.

_It was only a matter of time until it did though._

I walked up to the front door with purpose, I knew that Charlie was behind me and I was grateful for that – and because he was giving me distance, which was what I needed.

I wanted, no _needed_ to do this by myself.

I only knocked the door once, taking a step back to calm my nerves, when Billy suddenly answered – to my surprise, his expression was the same as mine. I looked slowly down at the man I knew so well, and to my sadness I noticed that he looked like a shell of what he used to be – but I could still see life in there, through his eyes which were exactly the same as Jacob's.

"Bella," he whispered, shocked.

"Erm, hi," I replied, seeming almost shy for some bizarre reason.

He leant against the side of his wheelchair so he could see Charlie step up behind me, and in that moment recognition dawned on his face… it was clear that he knew exactly why I was here.

He looked up at me, and slowly, a small smile formed on his face, "Would you like to come in?"

I accepted the conversation, and after some friendly small talk Billy agreed to my one lone request – to see Jacob's bedroom.

I slowly made my way through the door – feeling nervous to peak in, not knowing exactly what I would see when I stepped into his room. Would it be empty, gathering cobwebs? Or would it have been changed, and possibly turned into a study or a spare room or something?

Technically I should have expected what there was… I knew there was no way Billy would have changed Jacob's room so soon after everything, so why was I so stunned to see it the exact same way it had always been?

Everything… literally _everything_ down to the pictures on his bedside table was still in the same way… the way Jacob liked it. It was also spotlessly clean which I liked – it was really nice that Billy did that. It was as if he really did want to hold on to the memory of his sixteen-year-old son for as long as he could.

I slowly took a couple of steps into the room, finding myself unable to move any faster as the memories hit me like a wrecking ball. I slowly sat on the edge on the bed, nervous of messing it up somehow, and then reached across for the picture on the nightstand.

The tears spilled over as I looked at a fifteen year old Jacob and me, happy as we stood with arms around each other's shoulders on La Push beach. I didn't openly sob, as I looked at our smiling faces… no, I actually smiled myself as I allowed myself to think about the good times… and remember them instead of only thinking of the bad times.

My smile grew wider despite the bluriness of my vision caused through my tears. I slowly pulled my locker out from under my shirt, and opened it up, looking at the all too familiar picture of a smiling Jacob which was glued in. I sighed softly, wishing that I could see that smile one more time, and then whispered - "I miss you, Jake."

I spent more time in Jacob's room, waiting until my tears had stopped naturally falling, before making my way back to the kitchen where I knew Billy and Charlie were.

They both looked up as I entered, and something in my expression must have shocked them, due to their surprised expressions. I ignored the looks, and turned my attention to Billy, cutting straight to the point - "Why did you give me Jacob's truck?" I asked, my voice surprisingly weak.

"So it can be used… no use in having it sitting out here rotting away," Billy answered, before realising that I was hinting at more then that with my question - "plus, I know that Jacob would have wanted you to have it… and I do too."

His words surprised me, but I still wasn't completely sold - "It's too nice of you though… after what I did…"

He cut me off, "I don't blame you, Bella… _no one_ blames you for what happened," he insisted, his dark eyes wide. I saw Charlie nod too out of my peripheral vision, as Billy continued talking - "It was an accident… a _tragedy_… but it _wasn't_ your fault."

I blinked a couple of times, reassured by that last comment… I was now becoming close to believing it myself. "You really mean that?" I asked, stunned.

"Of course… look, Bella, I would be lying if I said I didn't blame you at one point – I've blamed almost everyone. Mainly myself for actually letting him go to Phoenix… but it was no one's fault. I've realised that we can't go on with blaming people – it won't change anything, and it won't help us with moving on." He insisted.

His words sunk in immediately – to me, his acceptance… his _forgiveness _was the most important of all. Jacob was the closest person in the world to him… and to know that he truly didn't blame me at all, meant more to me then words could describe.

And so, without saying anything, I leant down and hugged him, whispering two simple words - "_Thank you_."

Over Billy's shoulder I saw Charlie smiling at me, his face a mixture of emotions.

The most obvious one was staggering… it was _relief._

"_He takes a step back; He's under attack,  
__But he knows that no one can touch him now.  
__He seems so at ease, a strange inner peace,  
__Is all that he's feeling somehow._

_He thinks of his mother, he thinks of his bride-to-be,  
__He thinks of his father, his two younger brothers,  
__Gathered around the wide-screen TV._

_He looks to the left, he looks to the right,  
__And there in a golden ray of light, is his open man,  
__Just like he planned, the whole world is his tonight._

_He's got all kinds of time, he's got all kinds of time,  
__All kinds of time, he's got all kinds of time,  
__All kinds of time."_

Monday eventually arrived, and for the first time in a while I actually found myself waking up with a wide smile on my face – I felt happy, optimistic, hopeful… and I knew it was all because of the last couple of days. It had been a long painful year, but it felt like the last couple of weeks had just flown by… I knew it was because I was on my way… I was recovering. And it was amazing… I was finally realising what I had missed out on for so long. I got ready and drove my truck into school, never letting the smile slip from my face – I was aware of Charlie watching me from the window, and hoped that he was happy with the turn of events.

The smile was mostly on my face because I was excited to get to school – to see Edward again. Unfortunately, I somehow ended up late in today, so didn't have a chance to meet him by the lockers before class – ironic isn't it? Everyday that I had to walk, I always made it on time, but now that I had a car… I end up late. Instead of letting that fact bother me though, I just went looking for him at lunch, and smiled widely when I spotted him in the cafeteria, sitting in his usual spot with everyone. Unfortunately, I couldn't see his face, as I was approaching him from behind, so to stop that, I shyly wrapped my arms around his neck. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw him smile – something that reassured me.

"Hi," I grinned, resting my head on his shoulder, happier now that I was beside him.

He lifted his hands up so they were gently running along my forearms, which were still wrapped around his neck, "Mm, you're in a good mood today," he commented cheerfully.

"I sure am," I nodded, kissing his cheek quickly, before releasing my grip and taking the spare seat next to him. I then reached out and placed my hand on top of his, "Thank you again," I whispered, so only he could hear.

He smiled sweetly, "You're welcome, but what was this thank you for?"

I shrugged, as I pulled my apple out of my bag, "Just for… for all the things you said the other day," I told him quietly.

He laughed softly, flipping his hand around so he could thread his fingers through mine, "Silly Bella, you don't have to thank me for that."

I smiled and squeezed his hand, as we continued into further light, happy conversation, paying little attention to anything or anyone else around us. We only spoke to eachother, it wasn't to be rude to anyone… but it was more like the outside world didn't exist – and was more like it was just us in this room.

That thought suddenly reminded me of something I had planned to do today - "Can I do something?" I asked him nervously, as I reached into my bag again.

"That depends," he grinned, "… What is it?"

I hesitantly pulled my camera out of my bag, and fiddled with it, "Could I… take a picture… of us?" I asked him. It was a plan I had come up with on Saturday after seeing Jacob's bedroom. I decided that I wanted a picture of Edward and me for my nightstand – I thought it was only fair to have a picture of us alongside the picture of Jacob and me.

He clearly didn't expect me to ask this, "Oh yeah, sure," he replied, surprised. "Can I keep my glasses on though?" He asked somewhat shyly.

"Of course," I told him gently. I understood exactly why he wouldn't want them off… there was far too many people in here, and he was understandably shy about his eyes. I knew that I wouldn't dare ask him to take them off here anyway. Granted I had of course seen his eyes… but that was when it was just us two on the bench - it was a completely different scenario.

I shifted my seat so that I was pressed against Edward's side, and turned the camera on, before stretching my arm out to take a turn around picture of us. I playfully told Edward to _'say cheese'_, and then smiled widely myself, before pressing the button, taking the picture.

I turned it around to look at what the picture looked like, but frowned when I realised that I hadn't taken it at the right angle – it was only Edward in the picture, and half of my face. I told Edward what was wrong, and prepared to try again, when Alice gently interrupted us -

"I could take the picture if you want?" she suggested, a small smile on her face.

I looked up then and noticed that everyone at the table was watching us, their expressions kind. Well, except for Rosalie that is, but I once again tried my best to ignore her, and pretend she wasn't there.

I turned back to Alice and noticed how she was sitting directly opposite us, and would be able to take a good picture from there. "Okay… thanks," I smiled, as I handed her the camera, "It's the round silver button at the top."

"Got it," she grinned, as she lifted the camera up in front of her, "_smile_!"

As we posed for the picture, I noticed that Edward had grown quiet – and I was about to ask if he was okay, when his arm reached out and wrapped around my waist gently, holding me to him.

My smile grew even wider at that… I knew that he was okay.

The flash went off, signalling that the picture was taken. Alice examined the picture and then grinned smugly, before handing it back to me.

The picture was up on the screen, and once I saw it – I knew that this was it. It was just right, the angle, the look of happiness on _both_ of our faces… it was _beautiful_. "Thank you, that's perfect!" I told Alice gratefully.

I would print this out as soon as I got home, and put it in its rightful place – it wasn't going to be a replacement for the picture of Jacob and me, nothing would ever replace that. No, instead this picture would be there to show the future… my life now, with the man who was quickly becoming the most important person to me… _ever._

Edward's arm was still around my waist, and as far as I knew he had no intention of moving it, as his fingers continued to make gentle patterns along my sides. He seemed deep in thought, and I was just about to ask what he was thinking about when he spoke softly -

"I wish I could see it," he murmured sadly.

Instantly, guilt flooded me – I should have realised that this would upset him. "It's okay, it's just a picture," I told him gently.

He nodded, "I know… but being able to see it would mean that I could see you… that's what I really want," he whispered gently.

What does someone say to that? I knew I could have said that I was sorry… but what good would have that done? I wasn't magical… I couldn't change anything no matter how much I wished I could. Sadly, this is the way life is…

Although, I did love the fact that he wanted to properly see me… I wished more then anything that he could, but again realised that this wasn't possible.

So instead of that I leant up and gently kissed his cheek, before nuzzling against the side of his neck and resting my head there. "It's okay, don't be sad," I told him soothingly.

He nuzzled his nose into my hair, and I felt him smile. "I'm not," he whispered gently, his voice happier again – his arm tightened around my waist.

I relaxed against him, and looked up to see everyone once again had smiles on their faces – Emmett and Jasper were being discreet though and were looking down at their food. Rosalie once again was the exception as she continued to glare – something that unnerved me. I knew that I would have to find out what her problem with me was… because as far as I saw it, she had no reason to be this way with me.

Like I expected Alice, was still staring at us, shamelessly. Her smile was blinding as she spoke - "Bella, when you print that out could you print out an extra copy?" she asked softly; "It would be for Esme – I know she would love to see it."

"Of course," I replied instantly, "I'll do it tonight."

She smiled sweetly, and then turned to Jasper and started talking to him – I smiled as I watched them together, it was clear that they already thought so much of eachother… the way that they looked at eachother was indescribable… it was adoration, or maybe even love.

I wondered if that was the way I looked at Edward - actually, scrap that question… I _knew_ that I did… I absolutely adored him after all. No, what I really wondered was whether other people could actually see for themselves just how much he meant to me just through the way I looked at him…?

My answer was yes, they probably could.

Was it possible so soon though…?

As that thought came to me, it was in that exact moment that I felt Edward gently kiss the top of my head, as he whispered a soft and sweet, "Thank you," into my ear. His breath was gentle, yet it still gave me Goosebumps and it left me confused as to what I should say next.

And in answer to my next question… no, it wasn't too soon.

_It wasn't too soon at all. _

Towards the end of lunch I excused myself so I could go to the bathroom – I hated missing my time with Edward, but in this case, it was quite literally a necessity to do so. Once I was done, I left the cubicle, and headed towards the sinks, determined to quickly get back to sit with Edward before lunch was over.

Only, as I walked up to the sinks, two other girls entered the room.

I knew exactly who these girls were… and they were not the sort that I wanted to talk to. I quickly washed and dried my hands, and turned to head out of the room as quickly as I could – but as I turned I came face to face with the meanest of the girls, aka the bitch of the school.

_Lauren Mallory._

"Sorry," I mumbled, as I tried to walk past her.

Only as I tried to do so, she grabbed my elbow, stopping me mid-step, "Whoa, not so fast there, Bella." She sneered in her nasally voice.

I fought back the urge to roll my eyes.

"Yeah, in a hurry or something?" Lauren's friend, Tanya giggled beside her.

"Not exactly," I mumbled, crossing my arms in annoyance, wondering what on earth they were going to say next.

"Sure didn't look like it," Lauren retorted, "Oh! I get it… you wanted to get back to Edward didn't you?"

I didn't say anything.

Tanya took a step towards me, anger clear in her plastic complexion, "It's pathetic isn't it? The way you cling on to him… I bet he's _sick_ of you."

_Ouch._

"He's not… we're friends, that's all," I told them, knowing deep down that it was a lie… because we were so much more then that.

"Friends, huh? It doesn't look like it," Lauren grumbled, as she flipped her hair over her shoulder. "We saw the way you clung on to him earlier, it was so… _desperate._"

I was determined to keep calm… to not let them bother me, but for some reason that word just sent me over the edge. "Desperate? You're calling me that? Are you stupid or something?" I screamed at them both.

Clearly, saying that was a mistake; because the next thing I knew, Tanya stepped forward and shoved me backwards so hard that I stumbled and fell to the ground, landing hard on the grey tiles.

"How dare you call me stupid," she sneered as she stood, towering over me.

I tried to lift myself back up, but only got pushed back down – I tried to fight them but it was no use… I was outnumbered.

"What is your problem? I've done nothing to either of you," I asked them.

"Oh, but you have," Lauren laughed maliciously.

Tanya took another step forward, her high heels clicking against the tiles. "Edward, is supposed to be mine," she told me angrily, "he was going to be mine, and he _is_ going be mine – I will NOT let you stand in the way."

I didn't know what to say – I just remained on the dirty floor silent, completely shocked that any of this was happening.

They both looked at eachother with smug satisfied grins on their faces and to my relief, turned to walk away. However, just before they exited the door, Tanya turned back to me one more time, a hateful glare on her face –

"Consider this a warning," she told me, before she left, slamming the door behind her.

Once I knew they were definitely gone, I lifted myself up, wincing at the pain my elbow caused. I knew that a lot of people would have been terrified after that… but I honestly didn't care. If it was a week or so ago, I would have probably thought that all of this wasn't worth the effort… and that maybe it was better to just stay in the shadows, and have people like this ignore me.

Only, I didn't think this anymore.

I knew Edward well… and I knew that he wouldn't be interested in someone like Tanya. He was too kind, and too considerate to be with such a horrible, hateful witch. And I knew, that being friends with him was worth this… I could take people being mean and threatening me, just so long as I didn't lose him.

And so, as far as I was concerned, this hadn't even happened. I was going to go out and enjoy the rest of the day with Edward, and not worry about anything.

So, I stood up straight, and began walking out… only as I did, I noticed someone standing by the door. Someone who I hadn't noticed was watching the entire thing until now.

… It was Rosalie, and she had a wide smile on her face.

Unlike the end of lunch, English class was perfect… I couldn't have thought of a better way for it to go if I had tried. It was an easy lesson… as we were now working on our own independent essays, Mr Greene told us all to go to the library or to just stay in the classroom and work quietly, gathering our research for what we would write.

Edward and I went for the library option of course.

Only, after a while we decided to go for a walk, knowing that Mr. Greene wouldn't bother coming to check on us… that wasn't his style after all. We ended up walking through the rain, so we could go and sit in my truck – I considered suggesting that we should go for a drive, but then realised that Edward would probably want to stay here so that Emmett wouldn't worry by the time the end of school came.

We both laughed, as we told eachother embarrassing childhood stories. Only, as the conversation gradually grew more personal I finally noticed how Edward's hand never left my own… and how he would occasionally lean over to kiss me on the cheek, or forehead, like how I would do to him. It was what we had done for a while, but it just seemed so different now.

It was so sweet, so intimate… it _wasn't_ the way casual friends acted.

And so, I gathered up my courage, and as the conversation quietened down, I asked him the inevitable risky question - "What are we, Edward?"

He was still laughing quietly at my last story as he asked - "what do you mean?"

I was watching the rain run down the windscreen until now, but after his response I quickly turned so I could see his face – I had to see it as I asked this question.

"What are we… are we just friends? Best friends?" I asked him softly, "because I don't know about you, but the way I act… the way I feel around you… its not the way I would for just a friend."

"Me neither," he replied gently, his expression soft.

I smiled at the knowledge that he felt the same, but still had to find out the rest of the truth. "So… what now then?" I asked him quietly.

He looked down at his lap nervously, "Well… I was actually planning on asking you this later, but I guess I will now…"

He was confusing me… his words made no sense at all.

"What are you talking about?" I asked him softly, not wanting to seem rude.

As I spoke, he lifted his head up from his lap, and looked into my direction – making it seem once again like he was really seeing me. When he eventually spoke, his voice was incredibly nervous - "Bella… will you go on a date with me?"

Oh… wow.

"Yes…" – my reply was instant, no hesitation at all. I knew right away that this was the moment I had been waiting for – "Yes, I will."

"Really?" he grinned, as he lifted his hands to my face. I nodded several times, and he smiled as he felt the movement. His expression was breathtaking… it was so happy and so carefree.

_It was the same as mine._

His hands then gently began tracing my face, starting at my cheeks, then my eyelids… and then my lips.

His touch became more hesitant, and more gentle… it felt amazing.

I smiled as a sudden urge came over me; "can I try something?" I asked him softly.

He nodded, and taking that as a firm acceptance, I leant forward and very shyly brushed my lips against his. He gasped in surprise, but didn't pull away… and neither did I.

His hands reached back up to cradle my face again as we kissed again – only this time it was firmer, still hesitant… but more. The feeling was incredible… I never knew that it could feel like this. Granted, I had no one to compare it to, but still… I knew that nothing, _no one_ could ever make me feel like this.

It was right… and I now knew for certain that it was the way we were meant to be.

After a while we pulled away but still didn't loosen our grip on eachother, wanting to stay close, the way we were.

As I got my breath back, I slowly reached up and lifted his glasses off, smiling when he didn't say anything about it. Once again, I was met with beautiful emerald eyes that were so full of happiness that it was staggering.

And I now knew what I wanted to ask.

… And I knew that he would be fine with it and answer me.

"Edward?" I asked him quietly, my voice tender.

"Yeah?" he replied gently, his soft smile still in place.

I swallowed hard, and prepared myself for yet another difficult question. I decided to just come out and ask it… I _knew_ that he would be fine with it.

And so, I softly whispered - "How did you become blind?"

* * *

_So yeah, next chapter = Edward's story, more cuteness... need I say anymore?_

_Hope you all liked this chapter... please review if you did._

_Thanks for reading... Emma.x_


	6. Love

_A/N- Hii, thanks again for the reviews! It's once again really appreciated... I'm so excited that we're nearly at 100! _

_So yeah... last Wednesday I found out that I've gotten into my dream university (yay, bring on September!)… and due to my really good mood I wrote this whole chapter that day, and was ready to post it… when my computer crashed and I lost the entire 5,000 word chapter… yeah I was really angry haha. It took me a few days to bother to rewrite it… it just seemed like a lot of effort after already writing it once… so yeah, this chapter would have been out a lot sooner. But still, it's only been just over a week since the last update so I think I did okay. :D_

_Okay, so this is the longest chapter so far. Hope you all like it! Please review!_

* * *

"_God bless the child who can't find their way home,  
__God bless the child who is weary and so,  
__Oh, beware to take care of yourself,  
__Or you'll lack the strength to help somebody else._

_God bless the child who is broken and bruised,  
__God bless the child who just wants to be good__."_

_**Fearless**_

_**Chapter Six.**_

"How did you become blind?"

The words seemed to echo around the small space and with them I felt a huge amount of regret – I had killed what was a beautiful, sacred moment with my stupid curiosity.

Here we were in a happy, perfect situation… and due to my need to know more about him, I ended up reminding him of something that was obviously very painful to him.

_I wanted the ground to swallow me whole right now._

I had let myself get too curious and impatient for the truth… recently so many possibilities had been going through my head, such as – did he have a disease? Was he born this way? … There were so many possible scenarios, that a normal person wouldn't worry about.

But we weren't talking about normal here… this was me, and I just wanted to know the truth… I wanted to be able to help him.

I thought that him telling me the truth would break down the rest of his barriers like how my story did to me, and would hopefully help him in a positive way… and so he could gain trust in someone. Only, it didn't seem like that would be the case today… as despite my curiosity, I _knew_ that today was the wrong day to ask it, and that I deserved whatever way he reacted now.

As if on cue, Edward let out a soft, sad sigh and rested his head on my shoulder.

"I'm sorry… I shouldn't have asked that," I whispered, lowering my head slightly in shame.

"Don't be," he murmured back against the sleeve of my shirt, "You deserve to know after all."

I let out a soft sigh as he moved back slightly, and cradled my face in his hands again. "It's not really a terrible story… it's something simple really, it's just hard to remember that's all." He told me gently.

I nodded against his hands, "Yeah, I understand that feeling," I replied, knowing that was an understatement. "You don't have to tell me if you don't want to, I'm sorry for asking," I told him sadly.

Though to my surprise and relief, that beautiful smile that I loved grew across his face, "Stop saying sorry," he grinned at me, "I want to tell you – for some reason I've been putting it off until now, but nows the right time."

"If you're sure…" I whispered slowly, still dubious.

"I'm sure," he interrupted me gently, brushing his thumb across my cheek.

He then pulled away from me slightly so he could sit back in his seat and face in the direction of the window, I was sad at the loss of contact, but before I could make any move his hand reached over and grabbed mine.

"It happened when I was thirteen," he began explaining softly – and already that knowledge surprised me… he had been able to see just like I had predicted… he wasn't born this way.

His thumb began tracing circles on the back of my hand soothingly as he began the full story –

"Back then I was completely different… I was confident, lively… nothing bothered me. Like now, I didn't always get on with everyone though… a lot of people found me annoying, and perceived me as being over-confident and careless, which wasn't true. I just enjoyed living… I always made the most of every experience scared that it would be my last."

I smiled at that the thought of a happier, confident Edward… and tried to imagine it.

His voice was soft as he continued though, "We had just moved to New York – you see, as part of Carlisle's job we had to move a lot, mainly spending our time in the main cities. At the time I didn't resent it at all… I saw it as an adventure… as new places to explore. Only, Emmett didn't like it so much…" he trailed off for a moment, his voice growing sadder.

"He ended up becoming an enemy of a boy called James… he was older, I think sixteen something like that, and him and Emmett were always fighting over this one girl… none of us thought anything of it at the time though. After all, that's just what Emmett was like, and we assumed that James was harmless… though we couldn't have been more wrong."

He cleared his throat quietly, "One day, Emmett, Alice and I were walking home from school, taking the quick route through an alley – we were anxious to get home for something, though I can't remember what it was now. One thing I do remember however was that it was a very cold, dark day… it was December and there was ice on the streets. I remember having a sick nervous feeling in my stomach, almost as if I knew something was going to happen, and I later found out that Alice actually felt the same but didn't say anything at the time." He sighed sadly, shaking his head, before lifting it back up as he spoke again -

"It turned out that we were right… because out of nowhere, James and a few others appeared… they instantly started saying things to Emmett, threatening him. I was mad but held my anger in – I knew that Emmett could handle himself, but when they started on Alice I snapped…"

"… I ended up hitting one of the guys, and instantly a fight broke out… it was Emmett and me versus about five of them… we didn't have a chance. Alice ran off to get help, but we were too outnumbered to be able to run ourselves… so we fought. We weren't winning, but we were holding up… until two of them grabbed me from behind." He stopped there for a moment.

My breath caught in my throat, already knowing roughly where this story was going… and I knew that it wasn't going to be nice to hear at all.

Like I thought, the story was devastating - "One of them swung hard, and hit me right between the eyes. He got me really bad – I remember being stunned by the pain, and my vision becoming blurred even then. Little did I know that it would be the alley would be the last thing I ever saw…" He trailed off, his voice incredibly sad as he spoke – his eyes were starting to water slightly.

"… I don't remember much of it, but apparently they continued hitting me. And then pushed me into a wall where I ended up hitting my head incredibly hard at an odd angle… like I said I wasn't aware of that, the next thing I was aware of was the voices…"

"The voices?" I asked breathlessly, my voice cracking slightly.

He nodded, "Yeah… in the hospital a day or so later. I thought I was dreaming… because everything was black, yet I could hear my mother's voice and the doctors one too… explaining what had happened. Apparently, due to the continued pressure, I had something called Retinal Detachment… it's a very rare case, where the back of the retina separates, and can cause a lack of signals… aka a lack of sight." He told me sadly.

My free hand was covering my mouth by this point… when I asked for his story I wasn't expecting something like this. It was horrible, so cruel what those people had done… he had been through so much, and really didn't deserve it.

I didn't say anything though, and listened to the last part, even though all I wanted to do was cry for him - "He calmly asked how much I could see… and it then dawned on me that I was awake. I started panicking and asking him to help me open my eyes… because I couldn't see anything at all; it was all just _black_. After that, I heard the panic in his voice as he ordered for more tests to be run… apparently he didn't think it would be quite so severe and that my vision would only be blurred and not completely gone."

"… They eventually discovered that it was a complete detachment… and that it wouldn't heal by itself. This was now the way I was… the way I have been since the age of thirteen. I just had to learn how to adjust as best I could." He explained softly, as his voice grew even more agonised -

"… The worst part was how everyone blamed themselves… Emmett felt the worst because if it weren't for him falling out with James then this wouldn't have happened. Alice blamed herself because if I hadn't defended her… and if she was quicker in finding help then things might be different. Plus, my mom and dad also feel guilty – they think that if they didn't always move us places that it wouldn't have happened. Since then we've only moved twice… first to Chicago where we lived for nearly five years and then here… because they decided that small town life would help me." He explained sadly, before his expression suddenly changed, as if he was realising something.

He turned towards me quickly, "And they were right…" he smiled at me as he brushed his fingers gently down my cheek.

The tears were falling steady down my cheeks by this point, and he frowned when he felt the wetness against his fingertips. "Why are you crying, sweetheart?" he whispered softly.

I didn't hesitate in wrapping my arms around his neck and pulling myself to him, "I'm crying for you," I whispered against his shoulder, "you've been through so much… it must have been so hard…"

He began rubbing my back gently, "It was… but its okay now," he told me gently, his face pressing against my hair.

"What's it like?" I asked him softly – my tears were now stopping but I made no move to get out of his arms, and judging by the way his arms tightened around me, he didn't want me to move either.

"Honestly? It's difficult… knowing that I've had the opportunity to see things and that I now have to miss out. It's also lonely, frightening… loud noises are scary because I have _no clue_ what they are, and its like due to not being able to see my other sences are heightened… like noises for example only seem all the more louder – aka making me even more jumpy and scared. I hate that everything's a challenge… I can't do things easily, _normally_ even. It's painful too… every time I see a little bit of light or dream." He explained.

His last statement left me reeling though… dreams? _Light?_ "Whoa… what?" I asked in surprise, leaning back slightly to see his face.

He nodded, still smiling despite everything. "Sometimes, only _sometimes_… its like it's not black… its lighter, showing me that the sun is shining or a light is on. And yeah… I dream sometimes."

I couldn't believe it… after hearing such a heartbreaking story it was a relief to know that there was quite literally a light at the end of the tunnel. "… Meaning you actually see the dream?" I asked, not quite understanding what he meant.

He shrugged, "Kind of… its more like I can feel it through my senses, but yeah sometimes I see images… people and places mostly." He smiled softly.

Oh… _wow._

"What do you dream of?" I asked him breathlessly, grabbing hold of both of his hands in mine.

He squeezed my hands tenderly as he answered my question - "Places I've been and remember… people that I love, like my family. And, well…"

"Well what?" I asked him gently, a wide smile on my face caused by seeing him happier.

One half of his mouth lifted up, turning his smile almost shy as he whispered - "I dream of you."

He dreams of me…Me…?

_Me._

"Me…?" I asked him, stunned.

He nodded, grinning at something… possibly my reaction, "It's like its not completely clear… but I know that its you. I can't see your face clearly, but I can see your brown hair, and most of you." He admitted softly, before shaking his head nervously, "Sorry too much information…"

I leant towards him, not wanting him to be shy. "Don't be embarrassed, I think that's the loveliest thing I had ever heard, besides…" – I trailed off for a moment - "… I dream of you too." I admitted to him, knowing that I might as well by honest with him, seeing as he was being so open with me.

"Really?" he whispered, as I leant in for another hug. "We're both helpless aren't we?" he asked against my hair, as he squeezed me gently.

I nodded gently, "Hmm… but we're good though… good now we have eachother." I told him sweetly, silently wondering where all my sudden confidence was coming from.

He didn't seem fazed by it though… it fact his hold on me only tightened. "Yeah," he eventually replied.

I smiled, relaxing in his arms for a while before speaking again - "Thank you for sharing your story with me," I thanked him sweetly.

I felt him smile against the top of my head, "_Thank you_ for listening."

I nodded, and finally said what had been in my mind for a while - "You know what I think…? Asides from how I think that you are the bravest, most wonderful person in the world for fighting through all of that…"

He was laughing by this point, "what do you think?" he asked curiously.

I took a deep breath, certain that what I was about to say was true - "I think that the light… and the dreams are a sign."

I heard him take in a deep breath, "A sign?" he asked confused.

I nodded again, "Yeah… that _maybe_ one day you'll be able to see… its something that's meant for you. Just _please_… do _not_ give up hope, Edward."

_Because I wouldn't either._

"_You light the skies, up above me, A star, so bright, you blind me.  
__Yeah, don't close your eyes, don't fade away, don't fade away…_

_Yeah you and me we can ride on a star,  
__If you stay with me girl, We can rule the world…  
__Yeah you and me we can light up the sky,  
__If you stay by my side, We can rule the world._

_If walls break down, I will comfort you, If angels cry, oh I'll be there for you.  
__You've saved my soul, Don't leave me down, don't leave me down._

_All the stars are coming out tonight, They're lighting up the sky tonight…  
__For you, for you."_

The beautiful three-story house literally took my breath away the second I saw it… and I just _knew _that we were there.

… This was the place we were looking for.

"Okay… I think this it," I whispered as I turned to face Edward.

"Finally, we made it!" he grinned teasingly, turning to face me.

I looked over at him, annoyed and amused at his sarcasm, but then frowned at not being able to see his eyes… today they were covered by his sunglasses. Admittedly, I did understand why though… he was only comfortable with them off in front of one or two people, and there was likely to be a few more then that here today.

I ended that train of thought, and turned the truck engine off- a loud clank telling me it had successfully come to a stop. Once that was done I turned to face Edward again, resting my elbow against the steering wheel, "Hey, don't blame me! Blame your sister for these lousy written directions… it's seriously a maze in that forest," I muttered, half-serious and half-teasing.

He didn't seem fazed though. "What can I say? Don't trust Alice," he shrugged, not affected by my mood at all.

"I'll remember that," I told him as I opened my door and climbed out.

By the time I had walked around to him, he was already standing on the grass, and holding out his hand for me. I smiled as I threaded my fingers through his – it always made me feel calmer. It was now a week on from our day in my truck and since then things had been so much easier… we truly understood eachother now, and it made me feel so much better to know that he trusted me… like I was actually helping him like I had planned.

_Though none of those comments summed up what we were well… because our relationship was SO much more then that._

We slowly began walking up to the house hand in hand – I was rambling about how beautiful it was and how insignificant I felt in comparison, when he tugged on my hand, effectively stopping me mid-step.

I turned around to face him confused wanting an explanation, but he didn't say anything… he only lifted his hand to my face and slowly traced it with his fingertips, examining what my expression was.

He frowned slightly, "you're nervous…?" he asked sadly.

I sighed sadly, "How could I not be? Meeting your parents is a big deal! What if they don't like me?"

"Silly girl, they'll _adore_ you," he chuckled quietly, seeming unaware of my real panic.

I frowned, "How can you know that?" I asked him sadly.

He ran his fingers over my eyebrows and forehead gently before sighing gently and pulling me into his arms, "Because… I know them and I know you. Trust me, there's no chance of them not liking you."

I relaxed against his chest, "I hope you're right," I muttered against his coat.

He laughed brushing his lips across my forehead softly, "I'm _always_ right."

We stood there for several more moments before untangling ourselves from eachother and continuing our walk towards the grand house.

Edward squeezed my hand gently as we began walking up the steps leading to the front door, "I'm sorry you have to do this… once Esme saw that picture of us she just insisted on meeting you… and wouldn't take no for an answer," he told me quietly.

One week had passed since the picture was taken in the cafeteria, and like promised I had given it to Alice so she could show Esme. I didn't expect anything to happen, but it was only the next morning when Edward asked me if I would meet his parents.

It was so sweet… there was no way I was going to say no to his request. I was only regretting that decision slightly now as I grew more nervous… scared that they were going to hate me. I want them to like me because it would make Edward happy… and more certain that us being properly together really was the right route.

I looked up at Edward, "Don't apologise… I want to do this. Sorry for getting nervous on you," I told him.

Now that we were fully up the steps, he let go of my hand and instead wrapped his arm around my waist, pulling me against his side. "Don't apologise," he whispered to me, repeating my previous words.

I smiled up at him, relaxing against his side as he opened the front door and stepped through. And well, if I thought that the outside of the house was beautiful… it was _nothing_ compared to the interior.

"Wow, this is some home you have," I murmured in awe, as I took in the plush furniture, the grand staircase, the large windows which were giving a view of the forest…

He shrugged, "Esme's an interior designer, she wouldn't accept a house any less then this."

I didn't know what to make of his comment, but didn't have time to ask for more information because two other people entered the room.

I instantly knew that they were Edward's parents… because just like him they were gorgeous.

Edward obviously heard them come in because he smiled and lead me towards them, "Mom, dad… this is Bella." He whispered softly, his voice so tender and caring as he said my name.

"Hello," I murmured shyly, smiling politely – I felt Edward squeeze me tighter to him.

I needn't have worried at all though, because Esme stepped forward gracefully and pulled me into a warm hug, surprising me with her boldness.

"Oh Bella, it's so nice to finally meet you… we've heard _so much_ about you," she gushed as she released me, taking a step back to look at me fully.

I blushed, "Not bad things I hope," I murmured, only half teasing.

She laughed, "Oh definitely not," she reassured me, "it's just been so nice to see Edward with a smile on his face again… I was confused at first but then he told me all about you, and my… you're just as lovely as he and Alice said."

I'm sure my cheeks must have looked like they were on fire by now… her comments were just too kind. Edward seemed to sense how I felt as he stepped forward and wrapped his arm around my waist again, "Mom, stop embarrassing my girlfriend," he told her gently.

I thrilled at his casual use of the term… once again not believing my luck – I smiled up at him widely, completely awed once again by him and his beauty.

When I looked back at Esme, I saw that her smile had only grown wider having seen me looking at Edward… I now understood that all she wanted was for her son to be happy, which he was right now.

Carlisle stepped forward and introduced himself, surprising me too with a hug – clearly this family was very kind and loving, it was a very sweet quality.

Edward and I made casual conversation with them, and I only continued to relax more as I watched Edward interact with his family… I wondered how I had ever been nervous, and tried to remember a time I had something like this with both of my parents.

_But my mind came up blank._

"Bella, would you like a tour of the house?" Esme's kind voice broke through my momentary sadness.

I blinked a couple of times, and then nodded eagerly, "that sound's wonderful," I repeated enthusiastically, desperate to see the rest of this beautiful place.

Edward grinned and kissed my cheek, and then Esme wrapped her arm around me from the other side to where he was standing. Her touch was so caring, so motherly and the way she spoke matched her touches somehow.

We then started walking around together - neither Edward nor Esme's grip loosening slightly as we breezed through the rooms. The conversation was light and sweet, ranging through so many things… it was just the way family's acted.

_And I realised why … it was because they were my family now._

"_There's something about the way,  
__The street looks when it's just rained.  
__There's a glow off the pavement,  
__You walk me to the car.  
__And you know I want to ask you to dance right there,  
__In the middle of the parking lot, yeah._

_We're driving down the road,  
__I wonder if you know,  
__I'm trying so hard not to get caught up now.  
__But you're just so cool, run your hands through your hair,  
__Absentmindedly makin' me want you._

_And I don't know how it gets better than this,  
__You take my hand and drag me headfirst,  
__Fearless.  
__And I don't know why but with you I'd dance,  
__In a storm in my best dress,  
__Fearless._

_Well you stood there with me in the doorway,  
__My hands shake, I'm not usually this way but,  
__You pull me in and I'm a little more brave.  
__It's a first kiss, it's flawless, really something…  
__It's fearless."_

The lightening above us caused me to jump in fright… and like a knee-jerk reaction I slammed my foot on the brake, causing us to skid slightly along the wet road before pulling to a quick stop in a lay-by.

I shakily wrapped my arms around myself as the thunder boomed, literally making it feel like the car was shaking.

I closed my eyes tightly and held my hand out, needing comfort and solace… _something._

_And then his hand grabbed onto mine. _

"Are you okay?" he asked shakily, as his thumb rubbed soothing circles over my palm.

I shook my head as the road illuminated white again with the latest flash of lightening; "It's the storm… this is too much like…"

"What happened to you and Jacob?" - he finished the sentence for me.

I nodded slowly, finding it difficult to move due to shaking so much. "Mm Hm… I'm sorry but I can't drive until it's over, I can't and _won't_ risk it."

I expected Edward to insist we continue – after all it would technically be safer if we were indoors at his house, but instead his voice was soothing and understanding when he spoke - "It's okay, we'll wait it out."

I looked over at him in the seat beside me, "I'm sorry, I know you needed to get home…" I apologised to him sadly.

We had just spent several hours at my house studying and spending time together, and I was just driving him home – it had started great… things were so much better now we were closer and able to spend time together after school. Only as it was already dark when we left my house, I didn't notice the heavy storm clouds…, which ended up turning into this.

"It doesn't matter," he told me softly, "all that matters is that you're okay."

I felt myself relax a little at his words… but not quite enough. "I'm scared," I told him honestly.

He let out a soft breath, and then turned so that he was facing me, "come here," he suggested softly, opening his arms to me.

I didn't dare hesitate – I undid my seatbelt, and leant into his arms, grabbing hold of him like he was my lifeline.

_Which in this moment, he pretty much was. _

His arms wrapped around my back, holding me to him as I nuzzled my face into a comfortable spot – his neck. His went to my hair, and I heard him taking deep breaths, breathing in my scent… and I suddenly understood.

I remembered his words from a couple of weeks ago… _"It's also lonely, frightening… loud noises are scary because I have no clue what they are, and its like due to not being able to see… my other senses are heightened… like noises for example only seem all the more louder – aka making me even more jumpy and __scared__."_

… Storms frightened him too.

At that realisation, I only clutched onto him tighter and with my free hand, began running my fingers threw his hair gently… I heard him sigh in contentment.

_And then… _everything was okay again.

We waited it out, and before long the thunder faded away and the lightening stopped… and all that was left was the rain. Not like that was rare for this town.

I felt Edward relax against me, and his hold loosen very slightly. "Is it raining bad?" he asked me, his soft breath brushing my ear gently.

I looked over his shoulder out the window, "it's not as bad as before," I told him quietly, "… I think I'll be okay to drive now."

I was just pulling myself out of his arms, when a wide smile spread across his face. "Wait a minute," he told me eagerly, "there's something I want to do first."

And before I could ask him what that was, he was already opening his door and climbing out of the car into the rain.

"Wait… where are you going?" I asked him – only to receive no reply as he shut the door behind him.

He was crazy… but clearly I was too as I ended up climbing out the car myself to find him. He was standing at the front of the car, a wide smile on his face as he slightly tipped his head backwards, letting the rain drench him.

"Edward, get back in the truck, this is crazy," I told him, though my voice ended up a lot weaker then I intended… all because of the smile on his face.

He reached out and grabbed my hands; "the rain is so cold… so fresh. Doesn't it make you feel so _alive_?" He smiled softly at me as he lifted his sunglasses to the top of his head so I could see his eyes.

I planned to tell him _'no… it doesn't make me feel alive,' _when it seemed like everything changed… like everything came into perspective.

I noticed the beauty of the rain on the street, only illuminated by the one streetlight above us.

I noticed Edward's face, and how happy he looked.

And I noticed how happy I now felt… despite the storm that we had just faced.

… _And the storm which we had made it through together._

And… in this moment, as I stood here in the pouring rain in the darkness of midnight I knew one thing for certain.

I knew that now my life was no longer the miserable and lonely one I knew before… the one that was all I had known for seventeen years.

… And I also knew that it didn't matter that the girls at school were out to get me, it didn't matter that my mom still blamed me for my best friends death a year ago. And it didn't matter that no one really likes me, or ever has.

… _It didn't matter because I know that he does. _

In these weeks he has taught me so much - he has helped me become myself, away from the lifeless shadow that I used to be.

I looked over at him, to see his green eyes gleaming with some unknown emotion. "Do you want to dance?" he asked me softly, brushing my wet cheek with his fingertips.

And even though it was crazy… being out in this rain, soaked to the skin, with only the darkness of the sky above us. It seemed that somehow these things only made the moment even more perfect.

We laughed as we danced and we swayed together, and then he began spinning us around together, so fast I was sure we were going to fall.

_But I'm not afraid. _

Because of what he kept whispering in my ear- _"You are my life now… I love you, Isabella Swan."_

"You love me?" I whispered, pressing my cheek against his – it was the first time he had said those words to me.

He turned his face so he was nuzzling my cheek softly with his nose, "Truly, I do," he murmured against my skin.

I smiled, amazed and thrilled at those wonderful words… words I never thought I would hear or deserve. And I also knew undoubtedly that I felt the exact same for him… so I decided to tell him that.

"I love you too," I whispered to him softly, knowing that truer words had never been spoken. He was now my world… my reason for living – something that tonight just completely proved.

He leaned down and kissed me then, the rain mixing in as our lips softly brushed against eachother's. It was a kiss full of everything… relief, happiness, hope… and _love._

He broke the kiss gently and then rested his forehead against mine as the rain and our dancing slowed. Our arms still remained around eachother not wanting to let go – the way we would always feel from now on.

Matching wide smiles spread across our faces and we laughed in ecstasy… the happiest we'd been in so long.

We kissed again, and then he ever so softly whispered against my lips - "_You are my life now_."

* * *

_I know it may sound like the ending of the story, but we're now getting into the second part… aka the last four or five chapters. I know people thought that he could see through the preface, but this was always the plan – I planned to have this scene happen in chapter six before I even started writing. But yeah, I really hope you like it, and like the way the story goes from here!_

_Plus, please don't be mean over the Edward story… I'm not a doctor, nor do I know anything about blindness – everything on here came through internet research which I'm desperately hoping is right. But yeah, even if it is wrong, please try to ignore it? It is only fiction after all… its not like people go up to Stephenie and say 'vampires aren't real, don't write a book about them!'… I know, rubbish comparison… but yeah. :D_

_Anyway… next chapter should be up within the week, please review!_


	7. Happiness

_A/N- Hii, thanks for all the reviews again! I love that we're well into the hundred's now :D I'm writing to everyone in a minute... but yeah thanks so much. The comments for this story are always too sweet. _

_I did aim for this chapter to be out sooner... as I like to update every monday if I can. However things have been a bit crazy at the moment, so this has taken a week longer then I wanted it to. But ah well... its done now. The next chapter will be out sooner then this one though! _

_Anyway, hope you like this chapter... please review!_

* * *

_(The book of love- Peter Gabriel)_

"_The book of love is long and boring,  
__No one can lift the damn thing.  
__It's full of charts and facts and figures and instructions for dancing,  
__But I… I love it when you read to me,  
__And you… You can read me anything._

_The book of love has music in it,  
__In fact that's where music comes from.  
__Some of it is just transcendental,  
__Some of it is just really dumb.  
__But I… I love it when you sing to me,  
__And you… You can sing me anything._

_The book of love is long and boring,  
__And written very long ago.  
__It's full of flowers and heart-shaped boxes,  
__And things we're all too young to know."_

_**Fearless**_

_**Chapter Seven.**_

That night in the rain was just the start of it… the start of the rest of my life with Edward.

Until that day, it seemed as if time had just dragged by – like I was just floating through the days not really attached to my own body… and more like I was just watching the lifeless shell of myself floating around. Before I met Edward, it was like I never felt anything… and it was like I felt it was actually okay to be just be invisible and not making anything of myself… of my life.

However, ever since that day in English class… everything changed as I allowed myself to live again, and to fall in love for the first time.

And that night in the rain, as we breathlessly danced together, allowing ourselves to just feel the moment and to appreciate everything, I realised for certain this was it… _he_ was it for me. This wasn't just some high school fake relationship, or just _'love-struck' _kids… it was so much more then that.

_It was everything._

The rest of the autumn flew by and quickly turned into the winter and then gradually the approaching spring… which was now.

We did almost everything together… we celebrated our 18th birthdays, Christmas, Valentine's day… all those occasions. Not to mention, after much persuasion I convinced him to apply to college, telling him that he was more then able to go… and that I would help him. We eventually ended up both applying for Dartmouth as well as several others, which were of our own choices.

I could tell that Edward always worried that his disability would eventually affect the way I felt about him and that I would end up deciding I didn't want the burden… which I knew wasn't true. I didn't see his blindness as a disability or a burden… I saw it as something that was a part of him, something that only helped me fall in love with him even more.

It was now Late March, and with the end of school and graduation rapidly approaching we were determined to stay calm… which meant helping eachother as much as we could.

We were currently sat in Edward's room on his bed studying…

"_I never saw a more promising inclination; he was growing quite inattentive to other people, and wholly engrossed by her. Every time they met, it was more decided and remarkable. At his own ball he offended two or three young ladies, by not asking them to dance; and I spoke to him twice myself, without receiving an answer. Could there be finer symptoms? Is not general incivility the very essence of love?"_ - I read the words of Pride and Prejudice out loud.

"Hm, that book seems so much more interesting when its you reading it," Edward commented from beside me. We were both sitting on the bed, propped up against the headboard; our sides pressed together with books littered all around us.

I leant my head against his shoulder, looking up at him amused- "so you're saying that you don't think that the story of Elizabeth and Mr. Darcy is the best love story ever written?"

"No, I don't," he replied dryly, the smallest hint of a smile on his face.

I nodded, and ended up losing myself in my thoughts – which were just typical ramblings, and simple imagination.

"What are you thinking?" Edward's soft voice eventually whispered.

I looked up to see him smiling contentedly, his head facing in my direction.

"I was just thinking that we would make a better love story then Elizabeth and Mr. Darcy, that's all." I admitted to him shyly.

He chuckled quietly, "you're right," he murmured, moving so that he was lying down, and pulled me with him. "We really would," he whispered as he wrapped his arms tightly around me, pulling me against his chest.

_The broken girl and broken boy meet, and gradually heal eachother, falling in love in the process…_

_Yes… we would._

* * *

A few more days passed and something had changed in the atmosphere at school. I couldn't figure out what it was… nothing really struck me despite my strange feeling. Of course as the months had passed, we didn't really change… Edward and I continued sitting at the same lunch table with Alice, Emmett, Rosalie and Jasper, mostly keeping to ourselves.

_So why did something feel off today?_

I looked around the crowded room at the groups of people… noticing Angela and Ben sitting close together, looking like they were studying. A couple of tables down, Lauren and Tanya were sitting, surrounded by their usual friends. I quickly looked away, not bothered by them anymore… despite their threats, they actually hadn't bothered me since that day in October. Luckily for me they soon got boyfriends after that day and suddenly weren't interested in Edward anymore, so decided there was no need to say anything else to me.

I smiled slightly, and continued my sweeping gaze of the cafeteria not noticing anything off at all. I returned my attention back to my table, and glanced at our group… Alice and Jasper whispering things to eachother, Emmett and Rosalie were doing the same, with content smiles on all of their faces.

I looked up at Edward at that moment, noticing how deep in thought he looked… something big was clearly on his mind.

"Hey… you okay?" I whispered, squeezing his hand, which was holding mine.

"Fine," he replied somewhat robotically, his expression as hard as stone.

_Oh no. _

"What's wrong?" I asked shakily, not liking the idea of him being upset at all, "you can tell me you know that."

He turned his head in my direction, and sighed softly, "I know… and I will, but not here," he murmured softly, "How about tonight though?"

I nodded, though I was still concerned- "Sure… is it something bad?"

He shook his head, "No… not at all," he told me gently, a slow smile spreading across his face.

_So why act cold and detached earlier?_

I was about to call him out on that, but instead I only found myself feeling too relieved to see him smiling – it was nice to see it after seeing him looking upset. I decided to forget about it for now… I knew that I would get my answers later after all. "Okay then… we'll go for a drive or something after school then?" I suggested.

His smile grew wider, "sounds good," he replied softly.

"Great," I grinned as I kissed him on the cheek; "I'll be back in a minute, just going to the bathroom." I told him as a stood up from my chair. He nodded, so I kissed him on the cheek again, and walked off quickly, hoping to get back as soon as I could.

As I made my way into the bathroom, I considered what it was he was going to tell me… was it something about college? A sudden wave of dread hit me as I remembered that he still hadn't gotten his acceptance, whereas I'd gotten mine a week ago. Could that really be what it is though? He had said that it wasn't bad news, and surely not getting into Dartmouth could constitute as bad news…

_Wouldn't it?_

I tried to push that possibility to the back of my mind… Edward's smarter then I am, and if I managed to get in, there's no reason why he wouldn't.

Once I was finished I walked up the sinks to wash my hands and literally jumped when I saw Rosalie's reflection in the mirror staring at me. What surprised me the most wasn't that she was here… it was more her expression.

It wasn't cruel… it was interested… or curious even.

"Erm, hi," I mumbled quietly, before turning the hot water on, and looking down at my hands instead of her.

I didn't expect anything at all… perhaps a rude under the breath comment or a grumble under her breath as she slammed the door on her way out. What I certainly didn't expect was a friendly, genuine reply.

"Hi, Bella," she said softly, her voice barely audible above the running water.

I looked up in surprise, my brown eyes meeting her ice blue ones in the mirror… I mentally prepared myself for some horrible comments; after all it had been coming for a long time… she'd never outright told me how much she'd hated me, she'd only shown it through her expressions which were never kind.

However the horrible comments I expected never came.

Instead she only waited until the water stopped running to whisper, "I'm sorry."

I whirled around to face her, "what for?" I asked – though we both knew the answer to that. I just wanted to hear her say it out loud.

She shrugged and stepped towards me, her heels clicking against the tiles. "For the way I've acted around you… I've never been nice or welcoming, and I'm sorry for that," she told me gently, and by looking at her face expression and how sincere she looked… I knew that she really meant it.

I nodded, knowing that I needed more then that before forgiving her… I needed the real reason for her hostility. "Okay then, can I ask you one thing…?" I asked waiting for her to nod before finishing the question - "Why…? Was it something I did or said? Did I do something wrong?"

"Erm… not exactly," she replied vaguely looking somewhat guilty.

"Then why?" I asked, getting more determined for a response now. "Is it because of Edward?"

She looked up at me slowly, "Yes, it was."

I drew in a breath, suddenly nervous of the answer. Was it because she liked Edward, and wanted him to be with her? … I wouldn't know how to react if that was the case… I mean, I knew that other girls liked him – Tanya and Lauren proved that – but they were girls who didn't know him. Rosalie was his friend… what if he decided he wanted her too?"

"Well, go on then… explain it," I told her quietly, my voice showing my nerves.

She blinked in surprise at either my expression or my tone, but quickly answered my question – "I was afraid that you were just using him… as a way to get over your friend Jacob who died."

I gasped, "how did you know that?" I asked her shocked.

"It's a small town… I heard the gossip when you first moved here," she explained somewhat apologetically. "I'm sorry for your loss by the way."

I nodded but didn't say anything, finding it harder to breathe all of a sudden… it was the first time he had been mentioned in months, and to know that people had been gossiping about his death really hurt.

She realised that I wasn't going to talk so she continued herself, "when Edward and his family moved here, you may have noticed that me and Jasper instantly made friends with them. I got on really well with Emmett, as did Jasper with Alice… but Edward seemed like the one that was left out. He never said anything or acknowledged me or Jasper, and I quickly realised how hurt and alone he must have felt." She told me quietly, "… anyway, you and him made friends, and I guess I got defensive… I didn't like you, because I thought you were using him…and Alice, to get over your loss… as a replacement."

"That's not true," I whispered, stung by her accusations.

"I know that now," she told me softly. "I've seen you two together… and although it's taken me a long time to come to my senses, I have now. You're really good for him, Bella… and he's good for you. You are both so different from what you were in September. Even I can see that," she smiled slightly.

"Thank you," I whispered, touched by her words. "So that's why you acted that way then…? Because you thought I was going to hurt them?" I asked her quietly, just to confirm what I already believed.

She nodded, "Yeah, pretty much. It's stupid I know… but I just started acting like that and couldn't stop. I've had people use me like that, and I didn't want you doing the same to them."

I also nodded- I could kind of understand that. "So, is that why you were happy then – that day that Tanya and Lauren were horrible in here? Because you thought they would scare me off?" I asked her slowly, sadness and hurt thick in my voice.

She frowned for a moment, clearly remembering the incident before gasping in horror, "What? No… no, I honestly didn't."

_Right._

"Then why the smile?" I challenged her.

"Because I respected you," she replied instantly, surprising me. "They warned you off, and when most people would have just run away without looking back, you just got up, and went back to Edward… acting normal, like they didn't even affect you."

"Oh…" I gasped, stunned by what she was saying… it made sense. "That smile was misleading, you know." I managed to smile at her.

She bit her lip guiltily, "sorry, I didn't realise."

"It's okay," I told her, knowing that I was only speaking the truth… it really was okay.

Her expression softened, "can you forgive me then? For the way I treated you?"

I pushed the hair back from my eyes, "yeah, I can. Although I think you went about it all the wrong way, I understand what you mean, and I like that you're just looking out for them all." I told her sincerely.

Her expression softened even more at my words, becoming a full, kind smile that lit up her face. "Thank you," she breathed.

I knew then that things would be okay between Rosalie and me… we would probably never be best friends - _we were too different for that_ - but we had certainly come to an understanding. It was nice to know that she didn't hate me after all…

"So… tell me about him then," she grinned at me.

I instantly felt a wide smile spread across my face as I thought about Edward, "he's amazing… so gentle and kind, it's so easy to love him, because theres not one thing I dislike about him. He's so brave too – I know I wouldn't cope with blindness the way he does…"

Rosalie laughed quietly, her expression still kind - "I didn't mean Edward… I meant Jacob, your friend." She told me softly.

_Oh… wow. I wasn't expecting that._

"Oh, sorry…" I murmured quietly, not knowing what to say… I didn't really talk about Jacob to anyone apart from Edward after all.

She must have noticed my discomfort because she quickly changed her question, "Nah, its okay… start with Edward first actually, I want to hear about you and him." - She smiled kindly as she saw me visibly relax, - "… So when did you first talk to eachother then?"

I leaned my back against the sinks, smiling as I remembered back to September - to our good and not so good first meeting in English. I took a deep breath and gladly begun my story, relieved to not feel intimidated by her anymore - "Well, it all started in English class…"

* * *

"What's the view like?" Edward whispered beside me.

I let out a soft breath and tore my eyes away from him from the first time tonight, and finally looked around us. We were currently in Port Angeles, having driven here, and were sitting together on a bench facing the river.

The rest of the day had just flown by… following a very girly type of talk with Rosalie, I went to the rest of my classes and then met Edward at the end of school, ready for him to tell me his news.

I rested my head on his shoulder as I softly explained what I could see, "We're in front of the river… the sun's barely visible through the clouds but you can see it. It's setting right now, so there's a slight orange glow… even the water is an unusual colour. It's really pretty," I told him.

"It sounds it," he murmured, sounding slightly jealous and awed. "It's only a matter of time though…"

"'Till what?" I asked, looking back up at him.

He smiled down at me, "you'll see," he murmured, as he turned his head back in the direction of the river.

I frowned at him, growing more annoyed by his secretiveness – he had avoided all of my questions today following lunch. He hadn't even given me one hint as to what he had to tell me, apart from the fact that its _'not at all bad.'_

_Like that helps with my curiosity much._

I turned to look at the water too, and decided to just ask instead of letting my mind go crazy- "Can you tell me now?" I asked him, my voice slightly hurt… because I didn't like that he was keeping something big from me.

He turned back to me, tightening his arm, which was resting around my waist. He then dropped his head to my shoulder, "yes, of course," he whispered against the fabric of my coat.

I moved my face to his hair for a moment, taking in a deep breath. I decided to help him along a little – "Is it something to do with college?" I asked him.

"No… nothing to do with that," he whispered, "it's about my sight… my blindness I mean."

"Oh… what about it?" I asked softly, trying not to let my confusion become too obvious.

"I've been doing some investigating recently… about the possibility of getting my sight back," he explained, "and I've found something… a surgery that specialises in retinal detachment."

I gasped in surprise and joy; "Oh… wow… that's great! You mean you actually could…" I stuttered, barely able to get my words out – I was too in shock… I hadn't expected something as wonderful as this at all.

He lifted his head from my shoulder and pulled me into his arms. "It's great isn't it…? In a couple of weeks I may be able to see everything… the view you were talking about, the sky at night… _you."_

I smiled at his sweet words, burying my head against his neck, "Yeah… I'm so, so happy for you," I told him sincerely, before stiffening as something he had said registered with me - "Wait… in a couple of weeks? You mean you've already seen a doctor to book it?" I asked him confused.

I felt him take in a sharp breath, clearly not expecting my question, "Uh… yeah. I started looking for information around when we applied for college... I saw the doctor for tests a month ago." He told me softly, as he began running his fingers through my hair soothingly.

I relaxed at his soft touch but still felt hurt, "Why didn't you tell me?" I whispered against his skin.

"I… what?" he asked, shocked.

I felt tempted to pull away from him, but his touch was too soothing, even if it did nothing to get rid of the hurt I was feeling - "Why didn't you tell me before? I could have taken you to the appointment… wait, where is it anyway? It's can't be in Fork's surely?" I asked in a rush – my head was hurting through the mix of emotions I was feeling.

"It's in Seattle," he replied instantly before sighing softly, "… and I'm sorry I didn't tell you before… I just didn't want to build up false hope. I didn't want to disappoint you if the doctor told me I wasn't eligible for it."

His words were sweet, and I felt the anger and hurt slowly slipping away, "You still should have told me… I would have been there for you," I told him quietly.

"I know," he whispered, kissing the top of my head, "I'm sorry."

"It's okay," I told him honestly, pulling away so I could see his face, "I'm just so happy for you… when is the surgery?"

"Two week's today," he smiled, reaching out to trace my face with his fingers.

His hand cupped my face and I immediately leant against it, loving the warmth. "And the chances of it working are good?" I asked him softly, hoping that this question wouldn't worry him too much.

He didn't seem fazed though, and instead only grinned wider as he replied - "Very good."

I smiled wider, and placed my hand over his, closing my eyes slowly. "Can I be there? At the hospital with you?" I asked him shyly.

"Of course… I wouldn't want anyone else with me," he told me sweetly, rubbing his thumb along my cheek.

I leant in then and kissed him gently taking him by surprise. I kept my lips against his as I whispered- "I love you so much… you know that right?"

He nodded, "I love you too," he whispered, before he adjusted himself so that his lips were brushing against my ear as he softly whispered, "… and I can't wait to see the world with you."

_I can't wait either. _

* * *

_Okay, so this is the start of the second part now, hope you like the direction its shaping up to take. So far, my outlines going completely to plan - so as of now there's only three chapters left. They'll be long chapters so I won't be surprised if little bits get added in so we'll have another chapter or so. _

_Anyway please review... I think you'll all like the next couple of chapters, so yeah? How about a little bit of love? _

_Thanks for reading... Emma.x_


	8. Seperating

_A/N- Hi, thanks again for all the reviews. The support people give this story is amazing, and really appreciated, I'm still so surprised at the response, but yeah... I do love it. _

_Once again, I did plan to get this chapter out sooner, but life got in the way. Only two chapters to go after this, and I've already started on them, so they'll be out soon I promise!_

_Anyway, once again hoping you like this chapter, please review!_

* * *

_(If I could fly- Charity Chapman)_

_"If I could fly, I would go, And tell the world about you,_  
_If I could fly, I would go, And tell the world._  
_If I had wings, I would soar, Where no one ever cries,_  
_If I had wings, I would go, If I could fly._

_And I would run, And I would sing,_  
_And I would cross a stormy ocean, If I could be with you._  
_And I would run, And I would crawl,_  
_And I would walk a weary desert, If I could be with you."_

_**Fearless**_

_**Chapter eight.**_

Nine days… that was all we had to wait.

… It was just one week and two days to go until the surgery that would hopefully change Edward's life for the better. The excitement and nerves had really been in full swing since that evening in Port Angeles just under a week ago – at first all we felt was pure joy, but then… unfortunately the reality set in.

The reality of how much he'll have to adjust… and what he'll have to learn all over again. He'd been blind for five years now… and so, his memories of actually being able to see were hazy, and being without sight was pretty much all he knew now.

Plus there was also the reality of the other possible outcome… which was this surgery not working. Truthfully, none of us – not even Edward's family – had even mentioned the possibility of this happening… we had considered it in our minds but didn't want to dampen Edward's spirits by speaking our fears out loud.

It was wonderful to see him so happy after all… it was hard to actually be afraid of anything when I was around him - I was now fearless after all… or so I kept telling myself.

Edward, himself was completely different from the broken boy I had met back in September – just like how I was too – and although I do think the main reason for the change was because we found eachother. I have also noticed that even more hope and happiness has been restored to him this past week, due to this upcoming surgery.

He was talking more about college and the future… and all the things he wanted to do. He told me that he wanted us to take a trip to the beach, in somewhere like Miami… he'd only been to the beach a couple of times in his life, and he wanted to truly experience it.

He also wanted to visit Las Vegas and go to Six flags and ride all the rollercoasters for as long as he could stomach it. He also wanted to go to Canada to see the mountains, and Alaska to see the snow…

And he also wanted to get married.

That last one didn't surprise me as such – I always knew deep down that someone as sweet and romantic as Edward would eventually want that. What surprised me was how honest and open he was about it… and it made me wonder… _did he ever think about marrying me?_

Anyway, all of his dreams were beautiful and ambitious… and I so desperately wanted him to be able to achieve them. And so I really believed with everything in me that everything would be okay.

… Because the mere thought of this going wrong in any way at all, was completely heartbreaking.

It was a Sunday – tomorrow would be the start of Spring break, so I felt calm and a little relieved that I didn't have too much schoolwork to do… I knew that it would get any focus this next week anyway, what with everything going on.

I was just about to head over to Edward's for the afternoon, intent on just spending a nice, calm, fun day with him, when Charlie's voice stopped me just as I was heading out.

"Where are you going?" he called from what I could only assume was the living room.

"To Edward's, I'll be back to make dinner," I told him.

"Oh… well, don't you think you should be packing?" he asked back, confusion thick in his voice.

_Packing… for what?_

I walked into the front room, to predictably find Charlie on the sofa, watching some sort of fishing show on the TV.

"What do I need to pack for?" I asked him.

He jumped in surprise, clearly not having heard me come in. He turned his attention away from the TV and turned to face me, "Uh, for when you visit your mom." He told me.

"What… when?" I asked in surprise – though I already remembered.

Back at Christmas after much persuasion I had finally agreed to go and visit Renee in Phoenix for Spring break. She insisted that she wanted to spend some quality mother-daughter time together now that Phil was out of the picture.

I - of course - was hesitant… I still felt stung after her treatment of me after everything with Jacob – she found it incredibly easy to give up on me, and to just send me here and barely keep in contact. So when she asked me to go and visit and I refused to do so for a long time, until I finally caved in, after remembering that despite everything that has happened… she is still my mom and I miss her.

However, things were different now… the flight was in three days. I hated myself for not remembering before – but I had been distracted. All that my mind had been focused on was Edward and the upcoming surgery… everything else had been pushed to the side.

Which was why I couldn't go… I had to be here for Edward.

I took a deep breath, and began explaining, "Dad, I really don't think I should go…"

"Why not? I thought you'd want to see your mom," he interrupted me, seeming surprised.

I fought back the urge to roll my eyes, "Well, yeah… but we're not on good terms are we? We kind of fell out," I told him, hoping he would understand.

He only shrugged and turned his attention back the TV screen, "All the more reason to go Bells – you two need to reconnect."

I was growing more frustrated now, and walked around so I was blocking his view of the TV. "Okay, okay… but will I be able to handle it? Phoenix was where you know…" I trailed off.

He looked up in surprise, "That was a long time ago, Bella – nearly a year ago now, maybe it'll help you," he suggested.

_Or maybe it won't._

I remembered that I hadn't really thought about Jacob in a while… not in a negative way at least. I only ever remembered the good times now whenever I thought about him… and it was all because of Edward. But if I were separated from him and sent back to the place where everything happened… I didn't know how I would react.

_Perhaps I wasn't strong enough yet._

"I don't know about that," I told him sadly, biting my lip as I sat down on the coffee table that was opposite the couch.

Seeing my expression Charlie leant forward towards me, "There's something else isn't there?" he asked slowly.

I looked up in surprise, "How did you know?"

He managed to smile slightly, though it was sad, "I can tell something's up, I'm not blind, Bells," he told me, before freezing mid-sentence when he saw me flinch. Awareness suddenly dawned on his features; "It's Edward isn't it?"

_Wow, he was observant. _

I nodded, knowing there was no point in even trying to lie to someone like him, "Yeah it is, you know his surgery I told you about?" I asked, waiting for him to nod before continuing – "It's in a week, which is when I'll be away. Dad, I told him I would be there for him, I can't go," I insisted.

"He'll understand," Charlie replied automatically, no doubt in his voice- "just talk to him… I really think you should go see your mom Bella, and I think Edward will agree with me."

Well, knowing what Edward was like… Charlie sure was right there.

Still, I couldn't help but continue trying to find an argument against the whole idea, "But…"

But Charlie interrupted me again, "Look, why not try? If you hate it there, then you can come home early and still be back in time for Edward's surgery. Isn't it worth trying?" he asked, raising his eyebrows as if he was just daring me to argue against that point.

_Damn, I wasn't going to win this fight. _

"I guess," I sighed half-heartedly, as I turned towards the front door, wanting to get to Edward's now. Though while on my way out I made sure to call over my shoulder - "… but just to let you know, I'm not happy about this,"

I heard him chuckle from behind me, "Hate your mom, not me," he muttered.

I let out something that sounded like a mix of a growl and upset sigh as I bent down to pick up my bag, "Oh, don't worry," I called out loudly, before whispering - "_I already do_."

"_Highway run, into the midnight sun  
__Wheels go 'round and 'round, you're on my mind.  
__Restless hearts, sleep alone tonight,  
__Sendin' all my love, along the wire._

_They say that the road ain't no place to start a family,  
__Right down the line it's been you and me.  
__And lovin' a music man ain't always what it's supposed to be,  
__Oh girl, you stand by me…  
__I__'m forever yours, faithfully._

_Circus life, under the big top world,  
__We all need the clowns, to make us smile.  
__Through space and time, always another show,  
__Wondering where I am, Lost without you."_

"What are thinking about, Bella?"

I snapped out my daydream as soon as I heard that soft voice, filled with a mix of confusion… and even hurt. I looked up to see Edward's concerned face – his eyes filled with so much worry and emotion, even as they gazed unseeingly back into mine.

How could I tell them that I wasn't going to be there for him on the biggest day of his life?

_I couldn't. _

And so, I let out a sigh as I snuggled against his side, "Nothing."

I had been at his house for a couple of hours now – when I got here I was greeted by an enthusiastic Esme and Alice, who were still so full of excitement and happiness for Edward that I almost forgot about all my worries.

We spent a while talking, and then he – _my Edward_ - came downstairs to find me. Ever since then we'd been up in his room listening to music, lying side by side on his bed, as we comfortably talked about anything and everything. But clearly he had been able to pick up on my mood as I found myself barely able to focus on his words as I panicked about see my mom and leaving Edward behind for a couple of weeks.

Edward sighed sadly beside me; "you've been quiet and detached all afternoon, so don't tell me that nothings wrong. Has something upset you?" he asked me softly, as he turned us so we were lying facing eachother. His hand came up to softly cup my cheek, and he ran his thumb soothingly across my skin.

I closed my eyes in defeat – there was no way that I could lie to him, besides… he'll end up finding out soon enough anyway. No point in delaying the inevitable.

"Yes it is," I whispered just loud enough for him to hear, "my mom has been bothering me to visit her for ages, and I agreed a while ago. I completely forgot about it until earlier… and it's really bad," I sighed sadly.

Edward frowned slightly, "Don't take this the wrong way but what's bad about it? You'll get to spend some time with your mom and have a break…" he trailed off, before seeming to realise something - "is it because of everything that happened with Jacob over there?"

"Erm, no, not really, though that is putting me off a little bit," I told him truthfully, "no, the problem is with when my tickets booked for…"

"Oh?" Edward asked, raising his eyebrows in surprise.

I closed my eyes and leaned into his palm, which was still on my cheek, desperately wanting to feel his touch and warmth as I spoke. "Yeah… it's for three days time," I whispered sadly, just getting straight to the point. "… Which means that I won't be there for your surgery," I told him sadly.

He didn't say anything immediately, so I opened my eyes and looked at him… and to my horror his expression was hurt. Instantly my eyes welled up and I started rambling - "I'm so sorry… when I booked the tickets I didn't even know that you would have this surgery," I told him in a panicked rush, "if you want I could cancel… I'll just tell Renee that I can't leave you. I mean I really don't want to anyway but Charlie's insisting that I at least give it a try. I'm so sorry," I gasped as I began sobbing loudly, afraid that he would be mad at me, or worse… want me to leave.

However, at the sound of my crying, he removed his hand from my cheek and wrapped his arms fully around me, holding me to him as he rubbed my back soothingly. "Whoa, calm down sweetheart," he whispered, slightly panicked as he kissed my hair repeatedly, "it's okay, it's going to be okay."

"No, its not," I sobbed against his neck, "I so badly want to be there for you, the thought of being so far away from you while your going through that… it'll hurt so much."

He began rocking me back and forth slightly in a soothing motion as he pressed his lips to my cheek and spoke - "I know, I know, but there's no need to be upset, we'll work around it."

I shook my head in denial, "Really? How?" I asked him sadly.

"We'll keep in contact… as best we can anyway. To be honest from what I've heard, for the first few days after the surgery I'll be pretty much out of it anyway. But Alice can call you, and Esme can tell you…" he began explaining quickly, clearly trying to make me feel better.

I interrupted him gently though with the one reason why this really wasn't okay - "I want to be with you though," I whispered.

He let out a gentle breath against my cheek, "I know sweetheart, I want to be with you too, but this is okay, I promise. I'll talk to you as much as I can, and when I'm better… I'll come and meet you from the airport, and we can be properly together," he told me gently.

Admittedly his words did help – I felt myself begin to relax in his arms as my tears began to stop. I even managed to smile at the thought of what he had suggested… because it was such a beautiful image. Unfortunately though, the cynic in me came through, and I sadly realised that it probably wasn't possible. "I'm only going for a couple of weeks - it'll be too soon after your surgery, you won't be well enough for that," I whispered tenderly, hoping that my words wouldn't hurt him in any way.

He only smiled against my cheek though, before moving his lips to my ear to whisper - "I can try."

I smiled widely, feeling so in love with this man… it felt like my heart could burst any moment from the intensity of it. Surely it wasn't possible to love one person so much?

I snuggled closer to him, and when I spoke again my voice was much lighter and happier -"Alright… but airports are busy you know. But what if I can't see you? You won't know who I am will you, unless if Alice shows you a picture of something?" I asked him.

He shook his head though, "Of course I will… I'll just know, I won't need the picture," he insisted.

This comment really interested me - "Really?" But… how would that work?" I asked, completely stunned by what he had just suggested… and how certain he seemed of it.

He only smiled though, and once again reached out to brush his fingertips against my cheek, "How could I not recognise you? You're my Bella… my one and only true love… of course I'll know who you are." He whispered sweetly.

His words were just so wonderful that I couldn't help myself – I leaned in and pressed my lips to his. This action clearly surprised him, as he jumped slightly before reacting and lovingly kissing me back.

We kissed for a while before I pulled back slightly, only just enough to whisper – "I love you so much."

"I know, sweetheart," he smiled, kissing me on the cheek. "I love you too."

"I know," I grinned, repeating the action by kissing him on the cheek too.

After I pulled away I just snuggled against his chest again, and he seemed content to just hold me. We stayed that way for a while, just lying together, listening to the music that was still playing and the rain that was pattering again the window.

We were both silent, until a question came to my mind - "Are you scared?" I asked him quietly, not wanting to spoil the tenderness of this moment by speaking too loud.

"About what?" he murmured, running his fingers through my hair.

I closed my eyes, feeling very soothed by his sweet action, " about the surgery, about everything," I explained.

He paused for a moment, thinking through his answer - "Yes, I am, but it's okay, it makes it more real in a way… the fear reminds me that this is really happening." He whispered softly.

_Oh… wow._

"I'm sorry that I can't be there for you," I told him sadly, wishing once again that I could.

He only squeezed me tighter to him though, "You will be though - you love me… and that's more then enough… it'll see me through it all." He told me lovingly.

I smiled, suddenly finding all my fears fade away – because of his sweet words… I was sure only he could do that. So, I spoke my thoughts out loud, "And then when your better we can have the life together we've dreamed of," I told him excitedly, just picturing all the possibilities in my mind.

It was incredible… so exciting and wonderful.

I just prayed that everything worked out… it had too.

I so desperately tried to convince myself that it would, so told him that too…

_"We will… you'll see."_

* * *

_Lots of foreshadowing in here… can you spot where it is?_

_Sorry this was a little uneventful after the wait, but we've now fully built up to the last twists of the story. Next chapter will be big though… I've already started writing it and yeah there's going to be so much happening as we come to the end, that you really don't want to miss it! It's going to be a long chapter though, so I don't know how long it'll take to complete… I'll be as quick as I can though!_

_Anyway, please let me know what you think. Please review! _

_Thanks for reading... Emma.x_


	9. Home

_A/N- Hii, thanks again for the reviews! I'm still so relieved that people are sticking with this story, and have been for so long now. But yeah.. I'm writing to everyone now. _

_Sorry this took a while... but to be honest it's a really long chapter. It has honestly taken me ages and ages to write and I just couldn't decide what to do with some parts, I got there in the end though! So yeah... reviews would really be appreciated. More for this chapter then any. Really hope you all like this chapter! Only one more to go after this!_

_

* * *

__(Carry you home- Nashville Skyline)_

"_Come closer, we're alone,  
And it chills me to the bone.  
I wish that I'd been mad,  
To care, and carry you, carry you home._

_You're not the only one, Isolated and undone,  
So many miles to go, Well I know, I know._

_I know you think that you've been down,  
You never know when things will turn around, turn around  
I know you think that you've been down,  
You never know when things will turn around, turn around_

_Come closer, we're alone. And I know,  
You feel so helpless, I know, I know._

_December, I remember, We smiled for awhile.  
In December, Together we'll climb,  
And I'll carry you __home__."_

_**Fearless**_

_**Chapter nine.**_

The sunlight reflected off from the broken glass, and almost gave the illusion that the plastic was melting. The heat was the hottest I had ever felt it, and yet it didn't matter to me.

I stared, silently looking at the broken phone, somehow hoping that it was piece back together, but knowing that it didn't really matter either.

It's not like they were going to call anyway.

Instead, I was going to them… to him. I was finally going to be reunited with my salvation… I had to know if he was okay. I had to know why he wasn't contacting me…

And so, I wiped away the tears and turned back to the car, leaving everything behind me in my wake.

_1 week earlier…_

As the massive hoards of people passed us, I only clutched onto Edward tightly, like he was my lifeline. Which in this moment, he truly seemed like he was… I really didn't know how I was going to cope without him for these next couple of weeks.

"You'll call right?" I asked him anxiously, as I fisted his shirt in my hands.

"Yes," he replied, squeezing me gently.

I leant in to rest my head against his chest, breathing in his scent, "Will I be able to call you?" I whispered against the fabric.

He rested his chin on my head, "I think so yeah," he murmured.

It was the day that I was leaving to go and see Renee – and Edward had insisted on going with me to the airport, so he could draw out our goodbye… he said he wanted to spend as long as he could with me. However, because Edward had come with me, it also meant that Charlie had come too, partly to help by driving Edward back, and partly to say goodbye to me himself. We had already said our goodbyes to eachother, and so he was now hanging back to let me and Edward have a few minutes together before I had to board… and leave them behind.

I sniffed as a couple of tears fell down my cheeks, and just nuzzled myself closer to Edward. I knew that by the way I was acting, people would have thought that I was going away for a year and not two weeks. But I couldn't help the way I was acting… something deep down was telling me that this was a very bad idea.

Only, I never told anyone these thoughts out loud… though I couldn't help but think that some people suspected this, through how reassuring they were acting… Edward especially.

We continued holding eachother, and whispering our promises and devotion, when it happened… the announcement for my flight came over the intercom. I sighed sadly, and wiped another tear from my cheek, hoping that he wouldn't notice.

"I guess you have to go huh?" Edward whispered as he pressed his lips to my hair.

"Yeah, I guess so," I agreed, not making an effort to pull away from him.

He leant down to kiss my cheek, but frowned when he felt the wetness there. "Are you crying?" he whispered sadly, as he gently ran his hand across my cheek.

I nodded, knowing he would feel the movement, and he groaned, leaning his forehead against mine. "There's no need to be sad, love, we'll see eachother in a couple of weeks… it'll be okay."

"I know, but I just don't want to go," I mumbled.

He only hugged me tighter, and gently swayed us side to side, "I know that, but you'll be back soon," he whispered against my cheek, before pausing for a moment, swallowing heavily - "you _will_ come back to me right?" He suddenly asked nervously.

"Of course! I'll be counting down the days till I can see you again," I insisted, almost too loudly… how could he think I was even considering not coming back? Didn't he know he was now my soul reason for living? There was no way I could be without him.

"Me too," he sighed in relief, kissing me gently on the lips a couple of times before loosening his grip on me, "now go on, before the plane leaves without you," he said somewhat teasingly – though the sadness was very clear in his eyes.

"Oh, what a shame that would be," I teased him back, rolling my eyes, as I stepped away from him, "Goodbye then… I love you," I whispered, already feeling alone now I wasn't in his arms.

His expression told me he was feeling the same way, "I love you too, so much," he murmured, before raising his hand slightly in a wave, "goodbye love."

I sniffed, trying desperately to hold the tears in… suddenly that feeling I had that this was a very bad idea was back in full force. But I knew that I had to leave now, or I would never go.

I slowly walked through the crowds, looking back at him, until he was out of sight, and then I finally let the tears fall.

And I whispered, "Goodbye Edward."

EBEBEBEBEBEB

He did keep his promise… for a little while at least.

For the first couple of days that I was here, we were constantly calling eachother – wanting to hear eachother's voices. He told me that my voice helped calm his nerves, and convince him that his surgery was the right thing to do. While I told him that talking to him was the only thing keeping me sane… literally.

However, yesterday we hit a downward spiral – it was the day he went into hospital, so I obviously tried to call him to see if he was okay. Only… he never answered.

I left him text and voicemail messages, begging him to just let me know how things were going – only… I never got anything back. I refused to give up though, believing he had a good reason to act this way. After all, he promised me… and I knew he wouldn't break his promise.

And so, throughout yesterday and today so far, I dedicated almost all my attention to reconnecting with Renee. Unfortunately, things with her were strained to say the least… admittedly we did act the way we used too, by taking walks and cooking together. However, as picky as it sounds, I hated that she was acting like everything was okay between us.

She hadn't even apologised for the way she had acted a year ago… and that really bothered me, more then anything. Not to mention, she hadn't even asked much about Edward – and because of that didn't even know that he was in surgery right this moment.

Yep, his surgery was today, hence my panic on not being able to contact him.

I made my way downstairs in the house, looking round at everything, trying to commit it to memory… it had been so long since I was here after all. I vowed later on to try calling Carlisle and Alice if Edward didn't answer, but for now I was going to try my best not to worry. If anything bad or important did happen I'm sure they would tell me anyway.

I finally made it down to the kitchen, and called out for Renee, surprised that she wasn't down here yet. I then decided to start with making lunch for the both of us by myself and started by opening up the cupboards to find the ingredients for the pasta I was planning.

However… as I opened the first drawer, something caught my eye.

It was a picture frame placing upside down so I couldn't see the picture. Without thinking about it I quickly picked it up and flipped it around so I could see what was in it.

But what I saw took my breath away.

It was Jacob and me a year ago… the day before the accident. It was a candid photo – I never knew at the time that Renee had taken it – and it was of us just simply sitting on the sofa. I was laughing at something, while Jacob was looking at me, a wide smile on his face.

It was his eyes that shocked me though… the emotion that was in them. How had I not noticed it at the time?

He really did love me.

It was such a surprise that night on the road where he told me he wanted more, yet it shouldn't have been. It was here… as clear as daylight that he loved me, you could see it on every inch of his handsome face.

If I wasn't so dumb to not notice… maybe things might have been different.

We wouldn't have argued… and maybe he might still be here.

_Oh Jake, I'm sorry. _

I quickly pulled the photo I always kept in my pocket… the photo of me and Edward in the school cafeteria, and placed them next to eachother, trying to notice any difference in how happy I looked, or whether I was just as happy both times.

But it wasn't me who was the same… it was them. Both Edward and Jacob had the same expressions on their faces, which was so full of joy and love that I couldn't believe it was just for me.

I've known all along who my love is… and I know it will always be him, my Edward. But to know Jacob had felt this way, and had to cope with unrequited love… it must have been devastating.

I suddenly knew what I had to do now… I had to go back there. Back to where everything happened that rainy night.

My thoughts were interrupted by the sound of Renee coming into the room – I quickly placed the photo of Jacob and me back in the drawer and slammed it shut, before turning back to her with a smile. We both made casual conversation, before I remembered the photo still in my hand.

"Hey, mom, I've got something to show you," I told her awkwardly.

"Oh yeah, what's that?" she looked up, smiling at me.

I held out the picture, "it's a picture of me and Edward. I thought you'd want to see what he was like," I whispered.

Instantly her face grew excited, "Ooh, let me see," she said eagerly, stepping forward and taking the picture out of my hand. She took a step back and examined it for a while, her blue eyes bright. "Wow, he is handsome," she remarked.

"Like I said," I nodded.

"Mmm… why the glasses though? He shouldn't be covering up half his face like that," she asked me confused.

I rolled my eyes, "Mom, he's blind, he wears them to cover up his eyes," I told her as I gently took the picture back from her and looked at it myself, smiling at his beautiful face.

When I looked back up, to my dismay, Renee was frowning at me, "Why didn't you tell me he was blind?" she asked me slowly.

_Oh… no, I hadn't ever told her._ "I'm sorry, I guess that it never really came up," I told her apologetically.

She smiled slightly and nodded, accepting my apology. Before that frown came back into place, and she sighed as she spoke, "Bella, I don't know if it's such a good idea."

"What isn't?" I asked, now confused myself.

"Being with a blind man," she told me, seeming reluctant to say those words, "he can't take care of you the way someone else would," she whispered softly.

I gasped, shocked that she would say something like this… how could she think this of him? Hadn't I told her just how much I loved him and how much he'd helped me? Not to mention he'd taken much better care of me in these past months then what she had in my whole life.

"Of course he can… he does!" I told her angrily, "He has been there for me, he's always there – he loves me and that's _more_ then enough."

I hoped that my comment would have been enough – I would have accepted an apology now. However, I didn't get one - "Bella, I'm just saying that you shouldn't be so tied down so young. Especially not to someone who'll always rely on you – "

I cut her off, even angrier then before. I almost snarled the words out at her, furious that she would say these things about Edward - "How dare you! You just don't understand do you? You don't understand what he means to me."

She still didn't seem swayed though, and even began saying something else – "Bella, I –"

I cut her off again, and by this point, I was yelling, "No, mom… did you know that today he's going in for surgery? Trying to get his eyesight back?" I asked her, pausing for a moment to wipe away the angry tears that had fallen - "Its terrifying for him… either he'll get his sight back but be confused… having to learn everything again. Or he might just have to face up to the fact that he will actually never see again. And you think I should leave him for someone who can see?" I almost screamed, losing myself in my temper - not just at her comments, but at her in general.

"I didn't mean it like that, Bella," she sighed sadly, her expression and voice now much sadder and regretful then before.

"You did… please don't lie," I begged, before turning away from her as I began pacing the room, "This was such a waste of time, I wanted to be there for him, but he convinced me to come here, because he wanted me to be able to re-connect with you. That's how selfless he is, but you… you're just as selfish as you've always been," I muttered.

"I'm sorry," she apologised.

_Too late._

"Yeah, well…" I sighed, not knowing what to say to her anymore. She remained speechless, so during the silence I remembered what I was planning to do before we even had this conversation. So I turned back to face her, "can I borrow your car?" I asked.

She blinked, surprised by my change of conversation. "What?" She asked, confused.

I sighed, "Can I borrow your car? There's somewhere I need to go," I almost begged her.

She seemed reluctant, "But Bella, we need to talk this-"

I cut her off again, I knew it was rude… but at this moment I didn't care. "We'll talk when I get back, I promise I won't be long," I asked her, before adding - "please?"

She sighed and looked at me for a long time, her expression mostly unreadable. Clearly though she must have seen something in my own expression because hers softened, and she turned and picked up her keys from the cabinet before holding them out to me.

And then she finally whispered her agreement – the nicest thing she's done for me in a long, long time.

"Yes, of course you can."

EBEBEBEBEBEB

I had been here for hours now, crouched by the side of the road, with the flowers and note in hand, in the place where it all happened.

I knew that I would remember this exact spot for as long as I lived.

Yet being here wasn't as painful as I thought it would be… sure it hurt, and the tears had been falling steadily since I had been here, due to the memories going through my mind – the memories of whom I had lost.

But I no longer remembered that night… I no longer blamed myself.

Renee always told me that she believed that people had a purpose in life that had to be filled – and then and only then could they pass on. She believes that if its your time to die, it's your time to die… there's no arguing it, or avoiding it, no matter whom it hurts or who you have to leave behind. I always believed in her statement until a year ago – because I know it wasn't Jacob's time to die… he was still so young, and full of life. He hadn't achieved what he wanted to achieve… he hadn't even come close.

And for a while I believed it was my fault that he wasn't able to do all those things.

But I knew now… sure it wasn't his time, but who can really say that? What happened, happened. It wasn't anyone's fault, and I know if I could somehow talk to him that he would tell me that he didn't blame me and that he was okay.

And sitting here in the hot Phoenix sun, I managed to smile at the memory of Jacob, knowing what I had previously believed was true.

I was okay… I was _more_ then okay.

I would always miss him, and I would always wish he was still here, but I've accepted it. I knew this before, but coming here… to the exact spot where the accident happened just confirmed my thoughts, because I was here, and I was just as okay as I normally was.

I stayed sitting on the edge of the road, grateful that it was such a deserted highway – only a few cars passed in all the time I was there, which was nice. I knew that my thoughts would be disturbed if it were a busier road.

I eventually walked back to the car and put the radio on, wanting to hear some sort of music while I continued to stay lost in my thoughts. Admittedly, the radio was predictably a buzzing mess, but the music was still clear enough for me to hear. There was currently a song on that was announced as being called _'Carry you home,' _playing which I couldn't help but find ironic.

I hadn't really had a _'home' _in so long… until last September.

Despite what I had thought at the time, Phoenix was never my true home… it wasn't where I was meant to be at all. It was just sad that it took losing my best friend to realise that.

Home wasn't a place; it wasn't a building or somewhere you liked… it was where you belonged and where you were loved, never alone and always happy.

And I now knew that Fork's was my true home… because it was where I had grown up with my best friend, where Charlie lived and most importantly… where I met Edward.

I knew that wherever I went from now, that I would always think of it as my home… just so long as I had Edward with me.

I suddenly had a desperate urge to call him… mainly to ask him how his surgery went, but to also hear his voice… and to let him know that I was okay. I clicked dial and pressed the phone to my ear, praying desperately that he would answer… but as it continued to ring I began to lose hope. Eventually the voicemail came on, but I quickly cancelled out of that.

I kept trying to ring him, but after a couple of tries, my phone beeped loudly telling me it was out of battery. Suddenly I found myself angry for no real reason, and so I opened the car door, stepped out and threw the phone down the road with as much force as I could.

"Stupid piece of junk!"

It hit the road about 20 foot away and smashed into pieces, I smiled in satisfaction, before realising… I now had no way to contact Edward. I couldn't remember his cell number off by heart – it was only his home number that I knew, but he wasn't going to be there. The whole family were staying in Seattle until he had recovered.

I knew that there many other possibilities… I could ring the hospital for starters, or get Charlie to ask Jasper…. But I didn't want to take any of them options.

I had achieved what I wanted to achieve – I had reconnected with my mom, and faced my fears, coming back to the spot where it had all happened. And so I knew that it was now time to go home, to Edward.

I would be there for him to help him learn everything again, or to hold him and tell him I loved him if it hadn't worked… I hadn't been there for the surgery, but I would be there for the recovery, for all of it.

At that moment, I looked back at the smashed object, and noticed how the sunlight reflected off from the broken glass, and almost gave the illusion that it was melting. The heat was the hottest I had ever felt it, and yet it didn't matter to me.

I stared, silently looking at the broken phone, somehow hoping that it was piece back together, but knowing that it didn't really matter either.

_It's not like they were going to call anyway. _

Instead, I was going to them… to him. I was finally going to be reunited with my salvation… I had to know if he was okay. I had to know why he wasn't contacting me…

And so, I wiped away the tears and turned back to the car, leaving everything behind me in my wake.

_I'll be with you soon, my love. _

EBEBEBEBEBEBEB

"_Eighteen years had come and gone,  
__For momma they flew by,  
__But for me they drug on and on.  
__We were loading up that Chevy,  
__Both tryin' not to cry,  
__Momma kept on talking,  
__Putting off good-bye.  
__Then she took my hand and said,  
__Baby don't forget…_

_Before you hit the highway,  
__You better stop for gas,  
__There's a 50 in the ashtray,  
__In case you run short on cash.  
__Here's a map and here's a bible,  
__If you ever lose your way.  
__Just one more thing before you leave,  
__Don't forget to remember me."_

EBEBEBEBEBEBEB

"Do you really have to go?" Renee asked me sadly as we entered the large air-conditioned building… the airport. It was the day after my epiphany, and although my flight wasn't until the evening due to every flight being fully booked, I was here as early as I could be… because I somehow felt closer to Edward this way.

It was my first step towards closing the distance.

"Yes," I replied without hesitation as I walked ahead of her, "I probably shouldn't have come in the first place."

"Ouch…" she mumbled from behind me, stung by my comment, "Why do you think that?"

I sighed, and pulled my suitcase harder, annoyed at it… I could have sworn it wasn't this heavy before, "Because… I need to be with him… I shouldn't have ever left his side," I told her truthfully, as I paused to look at the signs, figuring out where I had to go.

"You were never like this whenever you had to leave Jacob," she commented quietly.

I didn't even wince when I heard his name… even if it did surprise me, "that's because I never loved him." I told her truthfully.

We finally found the check in and got in the queue. "I always thought you'd end up together," she told me.

Now this surprised me, "Really? Why?"

"You just seemed so attached… I always thought that one day you'd decide you loved him," she told me truthfully.

I looked at her, "That's not how it works," I told her, shaking my head.

"I know," she whispered, seeming dejected for a reason.

_I knew that I had to make her understand… if it was the last thing I did. _

"He was only ever a brother to me… he'll _always_ be my brother," I told her quietly. It was funny… throughout this whole trip we hadn't really approached the subject of Jacob at all… yet here we were - not long before I was due to leave - finally talking about it.

She was silent for a moment, watching me, taking in my words. And then she whispered - "You're so much stronger now."

"Yes, I am," I replied instantly, taking a step forward as the line progressed.

"Why?"

"Because I've got Edward… and people who support me, and who don't blame me for what happened," I told her, somewhat bitterly.

She was silent for a long time, and I didn't dare look in her direction, almost nervous of what I would see. She then took a deep breath, "I get it now…" she murmured, "you think I blamed you for what happened? Why would you think that?"

_Finally. _

"You sent me away, mom… it was like you were ashamed of me," I whispered, blinking away the tears as I turned to look at her.

She opened her mouth to reply, but in that same moment the assistant called me up. I glanced at Renee, and without hesitation, walked forward to the check in desk and handed my suitcase over.

I could feel her eyes on me the whole time I was checking in, and it was unnerving… not knowing what she was thinking, or what she was going to say. I considered just running away – because I was afraid of what I would hear – but then I remembered I was _fearless_… despite everything that happened, she was still my mom, and there was nothing to be afraid of.

And so, once I had finished checking in I went to join her on one of the seats she was sitting on. I held my head high, keeping my eyes solely focused on the departures board, relieved to see that my flight was on time. I smiled at the thought of being with Edward in mere hours, though all the possibilities rolled around in my mind.

He'll know by the time I get there… he'll know if the surgeries been a success or not. And I knew to be prepared for either the happiest Edward ever, or the saddest if it hadn't worked.

And I would help him no matter what.

Beside me, Renee cleared her throat, bringing me back out of my thoughts and back into the present. I turned to look at her, to see she was looking at me, and her blue eyes were misty with tears.

"I'm sorry," she whispered sadly, as one tear spilled down her cheek.

I nodded but didn't say anything.

She took a deep breath and ran her eyes over my face; "I shouldn't have sent you to Forks, I know that. But I have to tell you, it _wasn't_ because I was ashamed of you."

"It wasn't?" I asked, surprised.

"No, of course not… there was nothing to be ashamed of, was there?" she asked, raising an eyebrow slightly.

"No," I mumbled, shaking my head. "So why did you send me away then?"

"For a couple of reasons," she replied, "I knew that you found it difficult being here – near where it happened. Charlie and I discussed it and realised that perhaps a fresh start would be better for you, I worried that you would stay alone here… its not like you had many friends anyway. And… the second reason was because I was afraid of failing you," she whispered sadly.

Now that line truly did stun me, "F-Failing me?" I asked, my voice coming out really quiet, speechless almost.

She sighed, and in an action that was really familiar to me, ran her hand through her hair as she spoke. "I've hardly been the perfect mother for you – and I knew that I couldn't handle this, your grief right. I knew that I would end up interfering, whereas what you really needed was space… somewhere new to help you through it. And that was _exactly_ what Charlie could offer you," she explained.

"He never really talked to me much… only when he had to," I mumbled, still stunned by all of this… suddenly everything made sense, and I found all my resentment towards Renee fading away quickly.

She nodded, "I know – that must have been his method for dealing with everything, did it work?" she asked, before blinking and backtracking her comment, "Sorry stupid question, I can tell that it has… you're the happiest you've ever been," she smiled.

I nodded, matching her smile, but didn't say anything… I couldn't think of anything.

Her smile faded slightly, growing sad, and she leant forward stroking my hair gently, "I am sorry by the way, I really am," she told me sincerely, her eyes growing watery, "I'm sorry that I haven't been a good mom to you."

Something in her expression and words broke me… there was no way I could be mad at her anymore. I instantly knew that I accepted her apology, and decided to let her know, "I forgive you," I told her gently.

"You do?" she asked, surprised.

"Yes," I replied instantly – with no hesitation in my voice.

She then leant forward and pulled me into a tight hug, I responded instantly by resting my head against her shoulder, letting her hold on to me. I breathed in her warm scent and smiled, allowing myself to truly feel loved by my mother. It was so different to the types of hugs Edward and me shared, but almost as nice… She hadn't held me like this in a long, long time, and it suddenly dawned on me just how much I had been missing my mom all this time.

I blinked away the tears that had formed in my eyes, "Thank you by the way," I whispered, clutching at her.

"What are you thanking me for?" she whispered, her voice surprised but still tender.

"For sending me to Fork's. If it wasn't for you, I never would've met Edward, and he and I still would be been alone and unhappy – but because of you, we found eachother," I told her, smiling widely against her shoulder, "thank you."

She was silent for a while after that, and when she finally spoke I could tell that she was smiling.

"_You're welcome."_

EBEBEBEBEBEBEB

Leaving behind Renee turned out to be very difficult.

When I had to step away from her and board my plane, I turned to look at her one last time… and all I saw in her was myself twenty years on… if I didn't have someone like Edward. I could tell by the look in her blue eyes that she was still happy - or so she seemed to be - but something was lacking. There was something missing from her essential make-up and I had a feeling I knew what it was.

She was alone… she had no one to love her.

I suddenly knew how difficult it must have really been for her to send me to Fork's – I was all she had after all – but she did it out of love, because she truly thought it would be the best option for me.

_And she was right. _

It had taken a long time, but now Renee and me finally understood each other – yes, she was wayward and yes she liked to be crazy and spontaneous, but underneath she was exactly like me. She also craved company, friendship, and someone to love her.

I knew that she once had it with Charlie, but due to other aspects of her personality she panicked and lost it. I truly hoped that she would find that kind of love again, but knew that it wasn't a certain, so I promised to keep in more contact and to visit her more.

And in return, she promised to come and stay with Charlie and me for a little while.

Once those promises were made I finally felt content enough to leave her – even if it still hurt a lot. I quickly boarded my flight and before I knew it I was landing in Seattle and making my journey across the city to the hospital I knew Edward was in. The whole day had been a whirlwind and a rush… all because of my haste to be with Edward, and even though I could feel the fatigue catching up with me I refused to let it take over.

_I had to be with him first._

When in the hospital, I finally slowed my pace and made my way to the reception, finding out the correct ward. And then made my way to the open elevator, pressing the button for the right floor when I was in.

Once the doors closed I leant against the wall, closing my eyes as I took deep breaths to calm myself. I was suddenly very nervous for a number of reasons - mainly for finding out how Edward was… I was afraid that I would find out the surgery hadn't worked… because I was scared for him and how he would be dealing with it. And I was also scared because I remembered the last time I was in a hospital a year ago… and the very bad result that came from it – I feared that it could be the same again.

And there was also another, slightly irrational train of thought that made me nervous. What if Edward had got his sight back, but when he sees me he's not impressed? What if he thinks I'm not good enough, or beautiful enough for him?

I knew I was being far too insecure… Edward loves me; he won't think those things or speak them aloud. It was stupid of me really to worry about this, and far too selfish – it's not what I should be thinking about right now and the rational side of my mind told me to shut up.

However… another part of me was really scared about this and the fear that if he has got his sight back that he will want someone better.

However, before that train of thought could consume me, the doors opened revealing the ward. I quickly walked out, making my way towards the desk to ask which room Edward was in. There was one person already standing there asking questions so I stepped up behind them awaiting my turn. I casually glanced around, taking in my surroundings. It was a surprisingly quiet area, with only a few people sitting in the waiting chairs, but I guess that it wasn't weird considering the time.

As I looked at the people sitting there, one person looked back at me, annoyed at me for staring at them so I turned back to face the desk, embarrassed. However, I found myself turning back around again as two voices caught my attention… they were ones that I knew so well. I silently watched as Esme rounded the corner, coming clearly into view… with Edward holding her arm tightly.

All my breath came out at once, and I stepped back, away from the reception so that I was slightly covered by a large plant. I so desperately wanted to talk to him… to see that he was okay, but for now I just wanted to watch him.

I watched as they walked closer… even though he was relying on Esme a lot to help him walk, it was clear through the way his eyes flickered to everything around him that he could see a little again.

It felt like my heart expanded in my chest in that moment and I felt tears well up in eyes as I truly took in the scene in front of me. There were no words to describe the joy and happiness I felt for him in that moment… I had to brace myself against the wall to stop myself collapsing from the sheer force of it.

And yet somehow, it was a feeling of rightness… like this was the way things were supposed to happen all along. He deserved this after all; someone as wonderful as him deserved to see the world… the beauty and the complexity of it.

A wide smile spread on my face throughout my tears, and even though my blurred vision made it hard to see, I readied myself to step out… to go and see him truly.

_And to let him see me for the first time. _

I was no longer afraid of what he would think… because I knew that he loved me. He wasn't looking for the most beautiful girl in the world… or even close. I knew that now.

They were now closer, and I could just about make out their words as they spoke. I stayed back just so I could hear what they were saying –

"Wow, this is so weird… its so much brighter out here," Edward whispered, somewhat shakily.

"I know, but you'll get used to it I promise," Esme rubbed his arm soothingly as she smiled up at him.

He looked down so he could smile at her too, "I wasn't complaining… I love it. It's _much_ better then the darkness," he grinned excitedly.

"I'm so happy for you, son," Esme told him truthfully – you could see it in her expression that she was just so happy to see her son with the one thing he wanted the most. "I'm so happy that you got everything you wished for."

Something in her words changed him… his expression became thoughtful, almost sad even. "Thank you," he murmured quietly, before turning to look at her as they came to a stop… literally 10 foot away from me. "Did Alice manage to reach her yet?" he asked worriedly, as he looked down at his mother.

_Reach who?_

"No, I'm sorry," Esme replied softly, shaking her head.

He sighed, and let go of Esme's arm and instead ran his hands through his hair, "Do you think shes mad at me?" he asked her in a rush, not even waiting for a response before continuing. - "I told her we would keep contact but I failed, I just didn't want to worry her… I knew she needed that time with her mom."

_Oh… he meant me. How did I not realise that before? _

"I know," Esme nodded, understanding.

He didn't seem to hear her though and continued pulling at his hair, "Only now… I've been calling her and she won't answer… do you think shes okay? Should I ring Charlie?" he asked anxiously. My heart ached for him, and I almost stepped out and revealed myself right then… but something held me back.

Esme reached for Edward's hand, successfully freeing it from his hair, "I'll ring him for you, but please try not to worry. She'll be fine and I'm sure shes not mad at you, she loves you." She whispered, smiling up at him.

_She was right… I did… more then everything in the world. _

He nodded, "I just miss her that's all… I really do, I want her here," he murmured sadly, "Is that too selfish of me?"

Esme shook her head, "No dear, I'm sure she wants the same. Come on, let's go back to the room and we can call Charlie – perhaps he has Renee's home number we can try," she suggested, as she grabbed hold of his arm again.

"Okay," he visibly brightened at her words.

They both turned around and started walking back in my direction… I stepped back again, preparing to follow them in a minute or two. Only, as they both passed me… Edward looked directly at me.

I took in a deep breath, suddenly hopeful, that maybe, just maybe he would know who I was. Only… to my disappointment, it was barely even a fleeting glance, for as soon as he looked at me, he looked away.

However… just as soon as he looked away, he looked back at me again – his head snapping back in my direction as his eyes locked on mine.

His beautiful eyes turned curious, and a slight frown formed above his brow, as he stopped walking - Esme looked at him curiously. Only, as I looked back into his eyes… something had changed.

They were hopeful… disbelieving… _loving._

The green in them was brighter then I had ever seen… they were shining with so much life and wonder that it was literally _dazzling_.

And suddenly a breathtaking smile formed across his face… he let go of Esme and turned so he was fully facing me. I held my breath, not knowing what was going to happen next, but kept looking into his eyes… willing him on.

His green eyes sparkled with some new unrecognisable emotion and then he slowly took a step towards me, and when he spoke his next words it was not a question… he _knew._

_He knew who I was._

"Bella…" he whispered.

EBEBEBEBEBEBEB

"_When I, I saw your face,  
It was like a space,  
In my heart was filled.  
It's like I knew,  
From the very start,  
That you were every other part of me._

_And it's like I have loved you since,  
from the moment when…  
Since time began,  
You fill my heart._

_Oh, love of mine,_  
_Why did it take so long to find your Touch?_  
_Hope was never gone,_  
_Even though it took so long to find you._

_Because I have loved you since…  
From the moment when…  
Since time began,  
And I have loved you since  
__From the moment when  
__Since time began,  
__You fill my heart."_

EBEBEBEBEBEB

Everything around me became a blur… all sounds were blocked out, and it seemed like everyone in this hallway disappeared… because nothing, no one else mattered.

_Only him. _

At his two words, my smile only grew even more, and my breath came out at once… as I nodded at him.

His own smile grew to match my own… his face was now full of so much joy and love… that it almost seemed impossible. Surely it was… there was no way that this much love could be for me.

Only it was… as his arms opened wide in an invitation, and his expression turned pleading, asking me to come to him. And upon seeing that sweet action, my heart started racing… and with no hesitation at all, I ran to him as fast as I could.

He caught me easily - even though it knocked the breath out of both of us – and spun us around several times. I clutched on to him tightly, not wanting him or this moment to disappear.

He eventually stopped the spinning, but didn't loosen his hold at all; instead he whispered to me, "It's you, you came back…" he paused for a moment, before telling me - "you're so beautiful."

His words literally sent me over the edge, and the tears I'd been holding back for so long spilt over. "Of course I came back, I missed you so much," I whimpered into his shoulder.

He nuzzled his face into my hair, kissing the shell of my ear several times, "Oh sweetheart I missed you too, when you left it was like you took a piece of me with you," he murmured, moving his mouth to kiss my temple.

"I love you," I whispered, feeling completely calm and loved just through his touch, "… I'm so glad you're okay,"

"You too," he replied instantly, clutching me impossibly tighter to him.

I sighed gently, "What's it like…? Can you see everything?" I asked him curiously.

I felt him nod, "Kind of yeah… it's blurry, but it'll get better, I'll have to wear glasses… not dark ones this time though." He replied quietly.

"You'll look really handsome," I murmured, smiling at the thought.

He pulled back slightly to look at my face, and it shocked me to see that tears were falling down his own cheeks. I reached up to gently kiss them away, and he sighed softly at my touch.

He moved so he was nuzzling my cheek, and when he spoke, his lips brushed against my skin, "You're so beautiful… just as beautiful as I imagined," he whispered sweetly.

I felt my cheeks heat up at his compliment, and when he noticed the colour he chuckled kissing both cheeks, causing me to blush even more.

"How did you know it was me?" I asked him curiously.

He shrugged slightly, "I don't know… I just knew. I saw you, and I knew you were my Bella," he whispered, smiling.

Once again, I felt my heart racing at his words, "What did I ever do to deserve you?" I murmured, as I reached up to trace my fingers across his face gently.

"Oh believe me, Bella its me who's the lucky one," he murmured as he pulled me back to him, "I'm so, so lucky."

EBEBEBEBEBEB

The next couple of hours passed quickly… once Edward and I had spent some time reuniting, Esme cut in and hugged me tightly, telling me how happy she was to see me here. After that, we all walked back to Edward's room where Alice, Emmett and Carlisle were waiting. They all greeted me just as enthusiastically, and we all spent some time talking in the room, before Edward insisted on them going home… so he could spend some time alone with me.

It was another action that made me love him even more… if such a thing was even possible.

We both lay down on the bed, with my head resting on his chest and his arms wrapped around me, as he explained everything that had happened the past few days. He talked about how he'd gone on for the surgery, and had his bandages off 24 hours after it… which was literally only about 8 hours ago. He explained about how things slowly came back to him – and his vision came clearer as he remembered what everything was.

I promised that I would help him through everything… and that from now on I would never leave his side. I also explained everything that had happened in Phoenix and why he wasn't able to get hold of me… because of my broken phone on the highway. He held me and kissed me softly, whispering his love and how sorry he was for breaking his promise.

And then I remembered something… the picture of us in the cafeteria that I had in my bag. I quickly climbed off the bed, grabbing it out of the bag before resuming my position in Edward's arms on the bed. I handed it over to him as he smiled as he observed it, murmuring about how he could remember having the picture taken.

His expression softened even more as he traced my face with his fingertip, "You look so happy there," he whispered, smiling.

I smiled as well, and nuzzled myself even closer to him, "It's all down to you," I murmured against his chest, sighed when I heard him chuckle in disbelief. "I mean it Edward… I wouldn't be this happy, nor would I be this strong - hell I wouldn't have even had the courage to go back to Phoenix if it wasn't for you. You've… you've saved me, Edward," I told him, softly, allowing all my emotions to just pour out.

He was silent for a moment, before leaning down to kiss the top of my head, "You've saved me too… In every possible way," he whispered against my hair, "and now we can really live our life together."

"For forever," I smiled.

"You really mean that?" he murmured, awed.

"Yes, I do," I told him as I moved myself up so I could see his face, "you're it for me Edward, you're _everything_."

His smile grew wider, and then he gently pulled me up so that I was lying face to face next to him. He then leant forward, catching my lips in a passionate, loving kiss, "You're my everything too… my whole world," he whispered against my lips before pulling away slightly to see my face. His own expression was contemplative, doubtful and nervous before suddenly growing determined and excited as he whispered, - "Marry me?"

_Wow… did I hear him right?_

"What?" I gasped, stunned.

"Marry me," he replied instantly, his face bright and excited, "I mean why not? We've come through so much together, and now we've got our whole lives together… let's do it properly."

Something in his words triggered something in me… I remembered all the love I had and everything that we had come through.

And through everything that had happened in the past year, I remembered my realisation… you only have one life that could be over at any time, so you must live it and appreciate every single second of it.

_So why not?_

"Ask me again, please," I whispered, noticing that the words were out of my mouth before I really realised what I was saying.

His face lit up even more at my words, as he pulled me closer to him, kissing my forehead lovingly, allowing his lips to linger there before he pulled away to look at me again. He tenderly cupped my face as he sweetly whispered his words, "Isabella Swan, I promise to love you for the rest of my life and beyond… will you marry me?"

I knew that my response was incredibly important – it could possibly shape the rest of my life. And as I considered my answer, suddenly my whole life flashed before me, as all the events leading up until now came to me in a series of flashing images.

_My childhood… my parents separation… Jacob dying… my whole dark, heartbroken phase… meeting Edward… falling in love with him… _

… Basically everything leading up to now.

And then I imagined the future… everything that could be ahead of us.

A happy life… full of love and laughter, where nothing else really mattered but eachother. I imagined the house we would live in after we graduated college, and the two children we could have and love as we watched them grow up as we grew old together. We wouldn't want for anything but a happy, content life… because really, that was all that mattered.

It was life I had always dreamed of, but I never thought I could have.

And now it was just within my reach.

_And I wanted it… I wasn't going to lose. _

And with that I leant forward, so that my lips were brushing his, and with a wide smile on my face I whispered - _"Yes."_

* * *

_So yeah... thats chapter nine for you. I really hope you all liked it, I know most of you were really nervous about Edward not getting his sight back, so I hope you all like the happiness of this._

_Only one chapter to go now! So please review and let me know what you think... it only takes a minute as compared to the 6/7 hours it took me to write this chapter. _

_Anyway, thanks for reading! Emma.x_


	10. Future

_A/N- Hey, thank you again for the lovely reviews for the last chapter, I truly appreciate them all and the support people have shown for this story, I really do. _

_So, this is the final chapter... well, its more of an epilogue really. It's not over long, but I don't think it needs anymore adding to it. I really hope people like it, and the ending for this story. _

_Please review! ... Just because it's the last chance! It would be more appreciated then ever!_

* * *

_(My Love- Sia)_

"_My love, leave yourself behind,  
__Beat inside me, leave you blind.  
__My love, you have found peace,  
__You were searching for release._

_You gave it all, into the call,  
__You took a chance and,  
__You took a fall for us._

_You came thoughtfully, loved me faithfully,  
__You taught me honor, you did it for me.  
__Now I am strong (Now I am strong)  
__You gave me all anekatips,  
__You gave all you had and now I am home."_

_**Fearless**_

_**Chapter Ten.**_

_One Year Later…_

The daisies rustled softly in the summer breeze, causing a sweet scent to pass by me. I gently fisted the long grass in my hands, and felt it against my skin, as I closed my eyes allowing myself to truly appreciate this moment.

I eventually opened my eyes, and what first caught my eye was the sparkle coming from my ring finger. I smiled and with my other hand, gently ran my fingertip over it, appreciating the feel of the cool metal and how well it fit on me.

_Like it was always meant to be there. _

I smiled at the thought, knowing it was thoughts like this that had got me here. Edward and I had now been married a month, after having a sweet, small yet romantic ceremony in his families beautiful back garden. Luckily the sun had shone for us that day – a sure sign of the brighter future ahead of us.

The wedding itself was perfect as was married life so far… and I knew that it would stay that way. Things had fallen into place like the pieces of a puzzle fitting together… and despite a couple of bumps along the way, we had been fine… more then fine.

Renee had come for my graduation and stayed with me and Charlie and had been back many times since - most recently for my wedding. She was still here, and although she told me it was because she wanted to be there for me as I prepared for today, I had a suspicion that it had something to do with how close her and Charlie were getting again.

They didn't tell me anything about it, and that was more then fine – whatever it was, I would find out eventually and that was okay. They were different people now… they had changed in a good way, so maybe this reunion would come to something or maybe not. Either way as long as they were happy I honestly didn't mind.

Emmett and Rosalie had gone to college last year after graduation – they had both gone to the same one in New York and were happy. They had also come back for mine and Edward's wedding, before leaving a couple of weeks ago – they both had their own lives to live now after all. We kept in close contact with them, I especially considered both of them to be my best friends. Despite the shaky start with Rosalie, we had grown to become very close and I did miss her, but I was also happy for her too.

Alice and Jasper were leaving for college in a couple of weeks – they had chosen a closer option, deciding to go to the University of Washington together. They weren't after the same things that Rosalie and Emmett wanted, but were just as excited for their lives together.

Things had changed a lot… but in some ways they had stayed exactly the same.

Then there was my Edward… his sight hadn't been a problem at all since he got it back last April – sure he did struggle to adapt at first, but he took it all in his stride. He told me it was much, _much_ better adapting to the light compared to when he had to get used to the darkness. However, he did have to wear glasses most of the time, for most activities, but like I imagined he looked very handsome in them.

However, everytime I complimented him, he would respond telling me I was beautiful.

_And eventually I ended up believing him. _

We both decided to have a year out from college and just spent this past year just enjoying everything. And after a year and two-month long engagement, we married in July, aka last month.

Some people had said that perhaps it was too soon, and that we could be rushing into something we are not ready for. Because we're young after all, what could we really know about the world? We hadn't seen any of it yet or really experienced everything.

But everytime, my response would be along the lines of this, it was not too soon at all… because life is over too soon – both Edward's and my own experiences have proved this - so if we want to get married that's okay. And that we both know that we are ready for this because of everything we've been through.

And lastly I would always say – we know a lot about the world, more then what you would think. We will see it and we will experience everything… but it will be together.

_We were certain of that._

Everything that life had dealt me so far had only made me a stronger, braver person. I was fearless after all, and it was all down to him.

I smiled and crossed my legs underneath me, making myself more comfortable as I focused back to reality… to the memory right in front of me. It was only two years ago that it happened, but it felt like a lifetime ago – like a different me.

I was different now – in a good way. The essence of the old me would always be there, I could feel that as I remembered the old times, and everytime I dreamt of being young again at night. But it didn't compel me any more – it hadn't for a long, long time.

Once upon a time, I wished I had died that night too. However, I now knew for certain that I lived for a reason… I was meant too. Sometimes you can't fight with fate and destiny and just have to accept everything that comes your way.

_After all, whatever doesn't kill you, will only make you stronger. _

I knew that now.

I smiled tenderly as I ran my fingers across the white gravestone in front of me, re-reading the few words yet again.

_Jacob Black_

_Beloved Son_

_January 14__th__ 1992 - June 25__th__ 2008_

_Rest with the angels now. _

I had insisted on coming here today and Edward hadn't argued with it – he knew that it was something I needed to do before I moved on. I had been here for about an hour now, sitting on the grass, lost in my thoughts and perfectly content.

Truthfully I hadn't been to Jacob's grave enough in the past year, but that didn't really matter. He was in my mind a lot, and that was what counted. However, today was an important day – the day that I would leave Fork's behind me and move on with my husband – so I knew that I would have to come here to say goodbye.

I would visit again… I would come here any time we came back to see our families for Christmas or birthdays, but I knew it would probably be a while until I was next here.

I had told Jacob everything about my life, and how I was, and I also told him about Billy and how he was now a lot stronger too. And then I told him how we all missed him and loved him and hoped that was okay wherever he was.

But now I had nothing else left to say – it was hard talking to a stone after all. I wanted to hear something back, to know I wasn't alone, but all of a sudden I couldn't help but feel that way. It reminded me of my darkest days and I hated the feeling… the emptiness.

I wanted my husband.

And then, suddenly as if I was imagining him… he was there.

I knew it was Edward before I even saw him – I could tell by his scent and the sound of his footsteps on the grass. He gently sat down behind me, and then pulled me onto his lap, curling his arms around my waist. I immediately wrapped my arms around his neck and smiled up at him, and he smiled back in return, gently kissing me on the forehead.

And I relaxed in his arms, surrounded by his love, knowing that I would never be alone again.

I don't know what would have happened to me if I hadn't met Edward, maybe I would still be the way I was – so isolated, broken and alone - or perhaps I would have found my own false happiness. I probably would have gone to college, but would have never been as happy as I was now. I might have deluded myself into believing I was happy, but someday it would have hit me… that something or rather someone was missing.

Luckily I didn't have to dwell on those thoughts for long… because like I had realised – everything happens for a reason. I didn't have to worry about the thought of never meeting him, because it wasn't the reality. This… being here in his arms was. We met for a reason, and that reason was because we're meant for each other… we're meant to be.

There has never been any doubt in my mind about that.

Edward squeezed me tighter to him, nuzzling his face into my neck, "Are you okay, love?" he whispered against my skin.

"I am, thank you," I murmured, clutching on to his neck tighter. "I'm ready to go now."

"You sure?" he asked gently.

I nodded, "I'm sure," I replied, turning myself around on his lap so I could press my lips to his in a sweet kiss.

I felt him smile as he eagerly responded, kissing me back lovingly. We eventually pulled away from air, and with one more kiss to my cheek, he stood and pulled me up with him.

"Let's go then Mrs. Cullen," Edward smiled at me, as he wrapped his arm around my waist. His green eyes shining with so much light and love as he looked at me.

I nodded, gripping on to his hand as we began walking towards the exit – I looked back one last time at Jacob's gravestone and whispered one last goodbye, knowing that it wasn't really the reality… I would be here again as soon as I could. And somehow, someday… I would see him again.

I smiled and looked back at Edward, whose eyes were flickering everywhere, taking everything in. He did this all the time now – he had said it was because he wanted to appreciate everything now after spending such a long time not seeing everything.

His brand new Volvo which his parents had bought him for passing his test was there waiting for us, filled with as much of our belongings as we could fit in. Today we were making our way to Chicago for college, adventures and everything in between. We had already said our goodbyes to everyone, which was emotional, but not difficult.

After all, we were too excited about _everything_.

We didn't know what was in front of us, but we weren't afraid… we welcomed the unknown because we knew we would always have each other - and nothing else mattered.

Edward started the car, and held my hand tightly in his as we passed the sign telling us we were leaving Fork's. I smiled at it, knowing how much I really loved this place because of everything that had happened here, but also knowing how glad I was to get away.

It was time to really start living.

And so, I held on to Edward's hand as we continued to drive away from our past.

… And as we headed to our future, knowing it'll be okay... no matter what it may bring.

* * *

_Kind of an open ending don't you think? Hope you all liked it - please let me know what you think with a review, yeah? Feel free to ask any questions - I'll answer every one. Although before people ask... there will not be a sequel. It's going to be left here. _

_Thank you for reading. xx_


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